


Golden Child One shot

by JooBeomie



Category: Golden Child (Korea Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:15:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 37,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26121781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JooBeomie/pseuds/JooBeomie
Summary: I tried to translate my Jichan originally written in French.I hope there won’t be too many mistakes, sorry in advance >.< It's quite hard for me.
Relationships: Hong Joochan/Kim Jibeom
Comments: 5
Kudos: 21





	1. Habits

Habits

Jibeom was completely exhausted.

They had to perform several times in a row while taking the plane with almost no rest and so their comeback did not take place quite in the best of conditions. They were all pretty much out of power already. To tell the truth, he was perhaps the least fit for this time (or Daeyeol-hyung who had collapsed as soon as he returned) while Jangjun was still the most energetic. Nevertheless, they absolutely had to sleep. All of them. They needed to sleep. He needed to sleep.

Unfortunately, the imbeciles who shared his room didn’t seem to agree with him exactly.  
Donghyun and Jaehyun were having a pillow fight and Bomin kept talking to him (he didn’t know exactly about what).

It was hellish. He had asked them several times to calm down without any results. He could have just as well talked to a wall. Or several walls in this case. Worse, they had decided that he needed to relax and therefore participate in their games. Frankly, he was not in the mood and usually they would have dropped it quickly, but they were tired too. Just not the way he was.

_ You are a pain in the ass! he declared after a while.  
_ Oh come on hyung!

He came down from his bed and came out of the room, barely stopping to slam the door. He loved them but sometimes it was too much for him. How they could still have so much energy, it was still a mystery.  
He had to find a place to sleep… The living room was excluded, these idiots would not deprive themselves to come and disturb him at the first opportunity. So...he might as well avoid the snoring of Seungmin-hyung which had a light cold at the moment and bet on the calm and security of Daeyeol-hyung’s room. As a bonus, there was Joochan who wouldn’t mind letting him sleep with him if he didn’t give him time to protest.

Daeyeol blinked as he entered, evidently already almost asleep. Jibeom stepped over Joochan and settled between him and the wall.

_ Jibeomie?  
_ 'Tired. 'Make too many noises, he muttered.  
_ Ah.  
_ ‘Night.  
_ Sleep well.

Jibeom sighed of well-being and stuck a kiss on his friend’s cheek before snuggling against him and falling asleep.

_ Is that Jibeomie? asked Daeyeol.  
_ Yes hyung.  
_ I’m turning off the light now. Don’t make any noises the both of you.

Joochan would have point out to Daeyeol that Jibeom was sleeping, but he obviously didn’t care.  
Joochan played a moment with the hair of his comrade, for his part unable to fall asleep immediately. Jibeom had kissed him? He had never done anything like this before tonight, so...why?  
Not that it was unpleasant, no. Just...unusual. What made him tick was the fact that he had nothing against the fact that it became usual. He fell asleep on this thought, and when Daeyeol shook him the next day, asking him to wake up Jibeom, he gave him back the kiss of the day before. Jibeom had smiled, so, obviously, it suited him.  
Jibeom started again in the evening, a kiss on the forehead before going to bed, in his room this time. Joochan answered with a kiss on the temple the next day.

And just like that, it became a habit.

~~~~~~

The problem with habits is that you quickly become dependent on them.  
That is…  
So…  
They were in Tapei. At the hotel. Joochan shared his room with Bomin. And he couldn’t sleep. Even at 2:00 in the morning.  
Why didn’t he have the good idea to catch Jibeom before Jaehyun?  
Maybe he...could go to Jibeom? His friend had to sleep...but when in doubt, he could text him. It didn’t cost anything to try.

JC_  
Are you sleeping?  
JB_  
I’m trying. you?

Ah! That was a good start.

JC_  
Impossible  
JB_  
Too hot?

The heat did not help, he had to admit it. They had turned off the air conditioning who was too noisy and opened the windows but even the air was warm.

JC_  
No.  
JB_  
Bominie?

He glanced at the youngest lying on his bed completely asleep.

JC_  
Neither.  
JB_  
?  
JC_  
I didn’t get my good-night kiss.

The answer was slow to come and it made him nervous. They had never spoken or alluded to their little ritual before. Maybe he made a mistake?

JB_  
Do you want me to come?

Which was exactly what he needed!

JC_  
Or I can come.

One or the other. As long as he had his kiss and could sleep.

JB_  
I’m in the hallway.

He took a look at Bomin still out and went to open the door to his room.

_ You look tired, Joo.  
_ I know, he sighed. Come in! Why didn’t you sleep anyway?  
_ I don’t know.

He shrugged his shoulders, pouting amused as he saw Bomin now spread across his bed before regaining his focus on him.

_ Maybe I also needed a good night kiss.

Which was kind of reassuring. He wasn’t alone in that...thing. Or whatever was called what was between them at the moment.

_ You’re staying here?

His comrade’s eyes widened enough for him to notice even with his glasses.

_ … How could this be justified, Joo?  
_ I…

He didn’t think that far ahead. Of course, they had to be accountable.

_ Come here. You want me to kiss you where?  
_ Wherever you want.

Jibeom smirked before kissing him directly on the lips.

_ Sleep tight, Joochanie.  
_ Oh! You’re not leaving after that!

He knew full well that his cheeks had taken on the tint of a ripe tomato. Jibeom bit his lower lip, not looking very sure of himself.

_ I…  
_ You kissed me!  
_ You asked me, he answered immediately.  
_ This is true…

He couldn’t deny it, but…

_ I’m going now, okay? I’ll see you tomorrow.  
_ Sleep well, he murmured with a little pout. And thank you for coming.  
_ Good night, Joo.

He had no more trouble sleeping after that and he managed to catch Jibeom alone the next day to return the favor. He had to admit that it was a more pleasant kind of kiss. Not that he had much to compare. Not that he wants to kiss anyone else either, actually.  
Their performances went very well. It was always exciting to be in front of an audience and interact with their fans.  
They returned to Korea in the evening as they had a recording scheduled for the next morning. They wouldn’t have time to go to uni this week either, their schedule was completely saturated. And next month, they were going to Los Angeles. It was going to be fantastic. New York was already miraculous, especially so soon after they started, so Los Angeles… The only problem was the long flight and the time difference.

~~~~~~

_ Don’t think too hard, Joo, you’ll burn the few neurons you have left.  
_ Donghyun! Know that my neurons are doing very well!  
_ Really? Can you tell me why you’ve been staring at Jibeom for half an hour instead of warming up?  
_ I’m warming up, he replied distractingly.  
_ But what more?  
_ Hmm? I was just thinking that Jibeomie’s hair gets a glimmer when it’s wet, even with the dye.  
_ Yes? Jibeom has beautiful hair. Feel well Joo?  
_ He has nice eyes too. His hair is very black at the base, right?  
_ Black, yes. Joo, you’re starting to worry me seriously.  
_ Why? I’m fine.  
_ So stop admiring Jibeomie and warm up properly.  
_ Yes, yes.

Donghyun didn’t seem to understand his dilemma, but it wasn’t important. Especially since Daeyeol had just arrived and seemed to be fired up. They were going to suffer.  
Their leader had gone wild. Maybe he had a discussion with his brother because that’s generally what had that kind of effect on him. Even after several hours of rehearsing their choreography over and over again, he was ready to continue while they were all visibly exhausted. They were gonna get hurt. Especially Jibeom that Jangjun and he, helped by Seungmin, had to lift a moment and which fell more and more heavily. His ankles must have made him suffer. Not to say that he seemed heavier and heavier to them.

_ Come on, let’s go back! No more breaks!  
_ Daeyeol, that’s enough! It’s 1:00 in the morning, we all need rest if we want to be able to stand tomorrow.

Sungyoon-hyung had not even risen, but he would have been afraid if he was Daeyeol. Moreover, their leader had finally agreed to stop there, much to the relief of all members.  
Joochan stood up and went to Jibeom, who was slumped next to Jaehyun a little further.

_ Let’s go home, Jibeom-ah?  
_ …  
_ Jibeomie?  
_ …  
_ Are you asleep? Jibeomie! Jibeom-ah!  
_ I think Seungmin’s asleep too.  
_ They will catch cold if we leave them like this. You see Daeyeol. Training is good, misusing of it is absurd. What do we do now?  
_ Wake them up and go home. I’ll borrow the van for tonight.  
Which was easier said than done. Miraculously, Jibeom agreed to cling to him when he shook him. Showering him was a little more complicated, but Joochan handled it pretty well in his own opinion.

_ How do you still work, Joo?  
_ I’m determinate. How are your ankles?  
_ They’ve seen better, but they’ll be fine.  
_ Should I tape them up for you?  
_ Forget it, let’s go to sleep.  
_ I won’t rest if we don’t do something.  
_ Stubborn. Let’s at least leave the bathroom to the others.

Indeed, Daeyeol glared at them when they came out. They had not been very long though...

_ Sit down Jibeom-ah.  
_ Where?  
_ On my bed.

Jibeom did it without protesting. In any case, it was better to let him do it.  
Joochan took out his special strainer and pain kit of all kinds before carefully observing the 2 ankles. The right was a little swollen and the left a little hot. He could not spend too much time massaging him even if it would have done him good. He also needed to sleep. At least Jibeom was cooperative. He ended up bandaging his ankles in record time.

_ There you go! All done! You can go to bed, Jibeomie.  
_ …  
_ Or you can keep sleeping.

Of course he had fallen asleep, it was predictable. And perhaps, perhaps, he had hoped that he would fall asleep in his bed, because, perhaps, he liked to sleep with him. Not that he’d admit it to anyone.  
He pushed him under the duvet and settled against him. Jibeom murmured a 'good night' with a light kiss in the neck and Joochan fell asleep.


	2. Truth or Dare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again I'm very sorry for all the mistakes

Truth or Dare 

There were many ways in which things could have happened, and on reflection, the reality was far more fanciful than anything he could have thought of…  
To say that everything was the result of an innocent truth/dare game…  
Jaehyun, Donghyun, Bomin and he were on break after a good three hours spent reviewing their last chore. The rest of the group was due to arrive soon, so … they had decided to rest a little before resuming with the others. If they ever decided to come.  
And… oh… he didn’t like the glow in Bomin’s eyes… not at all. It usually didn’t result in anything good.

_ Why are the hyungs so long? whine the maknae spread out on the floor of the training room.  
_ They will come, said Donghyun. Why don’t you come and rehearse the chore instead.  
_ Pause Donghyun-ah! grunted Joochan slumped next to Bomin.  
_ Mercy Donghyun. We are exhausted and we will have to get back to it as soon as the others arrive.  
_ Okay, okay. I get it.  
_ I want to play! declared Bomin after a few minutes of silence.  
_ I thought you were tired…  
_ Dare or truth!

Donghyun sighed. Bomin was never really too tired to play and always relied on them to entertain him. And to make things better, he did not really know how the younger one was doing, but, strangely, the situation always turned to his advantage.  
Of course, the current game did not deviate from the rule. Choosing truth when Bomin asked the questions was suicidal. He already had so much blackmail material, it was not recommended to expose himself to it or provide even more. Choosing dare was unfortunately a disproportionate measure to limit the damage and he had made them do anything and everything.  
Maknae at the top, he deserved his nickname.  
And so… Donghyun had already had to give him a leg massage and Joochan tickled Jaehyun until he asked for mercy.

_ This is not rest, grumbled Joochan.  
_ Is it too easy hyung?  
_ You are impossible Bomin, you know? sighed Donghyun.

He gave them a big smile before turning to Joochan. It couldn’t be his turn again, could it? And it definitely couldn’t be Bomin turn yet?!

_ Don’t mind it, murmured Donghyun. It’s more tiring than 3 hours of training.  
_ What is hyung? ask Bomin with his most innocent look.  
_ You exaggerate Bomin. You wouldn’t do that if the hyungs were here.  
_ Perhaps not, admitted without difficulty the young man who really seemed to be having fun. Shall we continue?  
_ We have a choice? asked Jaehyun.  
_ Nop.  
_ When are the others supposed to arrive?  
_ Ah! That gives me an idea! So, Joochan-hyung, truth or dare?  
_ … Dare.

It was too dangerous to choose truth, even if the gleam in Bomin’s eyes did not bode well for him.

_ Kiss the next person who comes through the door! declared the youngest, obviously very proud of himself.  
_ Kissing? Like on the cheek?  
_ No, no. On the mouth, hyung! No cheating!  
_ … Really? Don’t laugh Jaehyun-ah!  
_ But if you don’t have to do it, it’s kind of fun to watch.  
_ Not at all! protested Joochan.  
_ A bit, chuckled Donghyun.  
_ Traitors…

As a result, Joochan was no longer in such a hurry to see the rest of the group arrive. On the other hand, Bomin could still find worse things to make them do.

_ Imagine if it’s Daeyeol-hyung!  
_ No, thank you.

He didn’t want to imagine anything at all. If he went back to the dormitories, could he escape?

_ That would be fun!  
_ Absolutely not!

They could at least sympathize rather than make fun of him!

_ We’re going to find out, here they are.  
_ Thank God this stupid game is over, mumbled Donghyun.

Couldn’t they have arrived 15 minutes earlier? They were already hearing Jangjun and Youngtaek.

_ Who? Who? Who? sang Bomin.

Joochan glared and frowned at him, promising to never again agree to play with Bomin. Under no circumstances. He could only hope that the one he kissed would be understanding.

_ A preference? asked Bomin.  
_ … The one who’ll cause least problems?  
_ And which one would it be? said Donghyun, shaking his head negatively.

He seemed relieved not to be in his place and at the same time… curious? The traitor.

_ Thanks for the support.

But he turned to the door that opened to let in… Sungyoon and Jibeom?

_ Ah!  
_ That’s funny that.  
_ Should he kiss both? asked Donghyun.

Joochan gave him a pat on the arm. Why did he give Bomin bad ideas. As if his situation was not complicated enough.

_ Hum… You can choose hyung, graciously consented the youngest.  
_ Choose? Choose?!  
_ Whoever you want, assured Bomin with a head movement towards their two comrades in full conversation.

Was it a choice? Of course he chose Jibeom! Did he look stupid? Sungyoon would chop him up if he dared to try that kind of thing. Jibeom would be understanding.  
Jibeom tilted his head slightly to the side in an interrogative manner when he stopped in front of him. He preferred not to give himself more time for reflection…except that he had not foreseen that it would be painful (bumping his teeth trying to go too fast could have this kind of result), nor that Jibeom tilted his head to kiss him cleanly (which was clearly more pleasant).

_ O-k… What did we miss? asked Jangjun, as his companions gaped at Jibeom and Joochan kiss each other.  
_ Uh…  
_ It’s not fair, murmured Jaehyun who had not imagined for a moment that Jibeom could enter first.

Bomin made a slight grin. He had not foreseen this. Although it was an interesting development. From his point of view at least. Jaehyun seemed to be sulking and Sungyoon seemed to wonder if he should intervene.

_ This is more action than I have seen in a long time, commented Daeyeol. Why is Jibeom entitled to preferential treatment?  
_ In fact we thought it would fall on you hyung, said Donghyun. You always walk ahead usually.  
_ You have no action with Sungyoon-hyung? asked Bomin with his eyes fixed on Joochan and Jibeom, who did not seem to want to stop in the immediate future.  
_ It would be known if there was any action between these two, Jangjun pointed out.  
_ Hey!  
_ That’s not true maybe leader-nim?

Daeyeol shrugged.

_ Somebody separate them so we can rehearse the chore.

Donghyun sighed as he saw no one react and grabbed Joochan by the collar of his shirt, pulling him back.

_ Bomin had not specified Joo, but kissing him only once would certainly have sufficed.

The young man turned to him, seeming not to really understand what he was saying. His eyes were huge and his pupils completely dilated.  
Jaehyun went to Jibeom and shook him slightly.

_ It was for a game Jibeom-ah. Don’t look at Joochan like that. Bomin has weird ideas.  
_ A game?  
_ Dare or truth.  
_ Oh…

And suddenly, his expression became completely neutral. Jaehyun took a step back, a little frightened. He had never seen his friend act that way before. Jibeom added nothing and moved on to the rest of the group to warm up and start rehearsal.

Jaehyun soon regretted having said things to him this way. The repetition and all the following had been catastrophic. Too quiet, too heavy. And Jibeom seemed to try to make himself as invisible as possible, avoiding them all and only speaking if someone asked him for something specific.

In fact, it wasn’t too obvious at the start because they were together all the time and there were no problems during their performances. But Jaehyun felt it especially. After all, Jibeom was his best friend, so when he turned his back on him when he sat next to him or voluntarily isolated himself, he saw him.

The problem? He didn’t know what to do to change the situation so… he was going to have to refer to someone else. But who?  
He looked at Jibeom who was pretending to sleep in the seat next to him, and sighed. They had a good hour’s drive back to the dorms, which gave him time to figure out some kind of strategy to get his best friend back.  
He let his gaze run through the rest of the van, stopping at Joochan. It all started with him, it wasn’t too far-fetched to think that he could also be the solution. But how? Moreover, now that he was watching him more closely, their main vocal did not look at its best either. He crossed Donghyun’s gaze and raised an eyebrow, receiving a shrug in response and a head move towards Jibeom.  
Interesting.

_ I propose that we lock them in a closet and let them both settle the matter, declared Jangjun’s voice, startling him.  
_ Do you think so?

Jangjun’s ideas usually had results… never seen before, but it was worth a try. Couldn’t be worse anyway, could it?  
Except that Jibeom and Joochan were not very cooperative!! And finding a closet was more complicated than it seemed at first. So… Jaehyun had summoned the rest of the group and was counting on them to figure out what to do with their two reluctant teammates.

_ What are they doing?  
_ I don’t know, but it sounds lively and they didn’t invite us.  
_ Sounds like a war council.

Joochan giggled before he could stop himself, delighted to provoke a smile in response.

_ I suggest we leave them to their shenanigans and go out for ice cream.  
_ Is that an invitation?  
_ A date, Joochan said very seriously.  
_ Really? asked Jibeom after a moment of silence.  
_ Absolutely. Avoiding you is far too complicated and counterproductive.  
_ … That is true.  
_ So… let’s go?  
_ Okay.

But Jibeom still seemed hesitant.

_ Don’t worry, said Joochan, as he was dragging him out, I’ll wait until I walk you home before I kiss you this time!

To which Jibeom replied with an incredulous look, followed by a magnificent smile. What more could one ask for?


	3. Pink Eyeshadow

Pink Eyeshadow

Joochan personally believed that much of it was due to Bomin and his inability to wake up and get up on time, especially on the days they went to school. Frankly, it wasn’t that hard to get up. Most of the time, at least. Of course, on this particular day, he just had slightly overslept, and it was Jibeom who had awakened him in time so that he would not be irremediably late.

The problem had arisen when he arrived at the makeup at the same time as Bomin when there was only one noona free. And of course, no one could deny Bomin anything.  
Unless your name was Donghyun.

Joochan had turned to Jibeom disappointed by it, hoping that he would come up with a miracle solution since there was very little time left before they were all forced to leave or else they would be late.

_ I don’t know… go without? You are very well without, said Jibeom with a disarming smile.  
_ It’s flattering, but…

Unfortunately it was not a good day to go there without makeup. There were supposed to be photographers today at the entrance of the school. He couldn’t remember exactly why, but there had to be.

_ You want me to do it? finally proposed Jibeom.

And it was this question that sealed his fate that day. He still wondered why the devil Jibeom had proposed such a thing. And why did he think it necessary to accept. He could say that it was tiredness, but he would lie.

So he agreed and Jibeom grabbed one of the makeup paddles. He was fairly certain that he had blushed for much of the operation. Having his teammate’s full attention focused on him in this way was unsettling and very unusual.

He barely had time to finish before being called away, and that was how he made the mistake of not looking at what his friend had done.  
He should have been able to count on the others, but Bomin was still in zombie mode, Jaehyun had his head in the moon not to change and Youngtaek was struggling to finish his geography assignment.  
The manager gave him a surprised look, but he didn’t pay attention, trying to remember what was planned after school.

He began to wonder when his comrades had looked at him with more attention than usual, but as no one had said anything to him, not even the teachers, he had ignored the thing, being content to be annoyed internally and trying to survive the day.

The classes had been incredibly long. He had forgotten his math homework in the dormitories and one of his classmates had inadvertently spilled a part of his water bottle on him. Did he have to say that the water was mixed with pomegranate syrup and that his white shirt had not survived it? He didn’t know who was doing laundry at the dorms but he wasn’t going to be happy. Not to mention the fact that he had to walk around with a stained, sticky shirt.

Even the dance class was catastrophic. The teacher wanted him to demonstrate several movements, which he would have happily passed and in the end, a fool wanted to show off, twisting his ankle in the process. This had earned them a long, very long sermon.  
At least it wasn’t him who hurt himself. It was a consolation.

He snapped when he got in the van and Bomin stared at him for a good five minutes before taking out his phone to take a picture.

_ You want to die? What the hell is the problem?!  
_ Did you looked into a mirror? asked Youngtaek. What did your makeup artist have in mind?  
_ I was late, he murmured.  
_ It’s rather original I think? said Jaehyun a little hesitant.  
_ I like it, added Bomin after a few more minutes of observation. But how did you find a last minute makeup artist, hyung?

Joochan did not answer, busy observing himself frantically with his phone. What had Jibeom done?!

_ That’s pretty good, said Youngtaek. Surprising, but…  
_ It suits you well hyung. It’s really nice.

Okay. It wasn’t catastrophic. Jibeom had done a great job. He had just...abused a little with the pink eyeshadow. And if it was surprising at first, it looked pretty good.

_ Isn’t it weird?  
_ Not even, said Youngtaek who seemed a little disappointed.  
_ It’s original, repeated Jaehyun.

Joochan frowned. Were they laughing at him? He never knew with them. They’d be able to let him walk around with a stain on his nose if they had the chance.

_ Really Joochan, said Youngtaek. It looks good. A bit surprising at first, but it’s good. You didn’t check before leaving?  
_ I was late…  
_ You should keep this makeup artist, murmured Jaehyun. Not like Sungyoon-hyung, hers always misses the base.  
_ And let us not speak of the eyes, added Youngtaek with a grimace.  
_ Will you show me who it is? I’ll try, too, said Bomin.  
_ Pink wouldn’t look so good on you.  
_ But she would certainly do something else to me. Which one is it, hyung?  
_ Which?  
_ Make-up artist.  
_ Oh! No, I was late, they wouldn’t help me. I asked Jibeom.

What did they have now? Just singing lessons and a little dancing if his memories were good. That was enough after one day of class!

_ Our Jibeom? asked Jaehyun after a while.  
_ Hmm? You know another one? When he had theater classes last year, his class had makeup training.  
_ I don’t think it was that kind of makeup, Youngtaek laughed.  
_ You said it looked good!  
_ It looks good, said Bomin.  
_ It was just risky.  
_ Jibeom wouldn’t have done it to me if he didn’t know how.  
_ It’s still very pink, Jaehyun remarked.  
_ But it looks like professional work. Since when does Jibeom know how to do this kind of thing?  
_ Who know. I’m happy with the result. It’s just a little strange that everyone is staring at me.  
_ You’re an idol Joochan, everyone’s staring at you.  
_ Not at school.

Not like he could do anything about it anyway.  
Of course, it could not end there and so, when they had returned, Bomin and Youngtaek had rushed to Jibeom to ask him details and curiously, their comrade had not appreciated it too much. He had to go and save him, but in the meantime, Donghyun had also started and Jangjun also when he had understood that something was going on.  
The hustle and bustle had attracted the elders who had lectured him for his oversleeping. As if he had not had enough sermons that day…

To make things right, his photo was displayed on all social networks because his classmates had not been the only ones to notice his special makeup.

_Did Jibeomie really do this?

Joochan sighed. Even Sungyoon blamed him now?

_ I was late.  
_ You should be late more often.

He was not sure if he agreed with that.  
Jibeom apologized. That was absolutely unnecessary. He had tried to explain to him that everyone thought it was original and well done, but this mule head did not seem to believe it, merely apologizing once again.

That’s why he decided to go to their next shoot with the same makeup. The fans loved it if he believed their comments. The problem? For some unknown reason, Jibeom had carefully avoided him the following days and it began to annoy him prodigiously.  
He didn’t understand why until Donghyun took him apart and patiently explained to him that Jibeom thought he had done this to make fun of him.

_ But it’s stupid…  
_ It’s Jibeom. He’s not sure enough of himself, it’s not new.  
_ But it was really well done! Everyone said it.  
_ It is not to me you need to say it. But I believe that Bomin who follows him everywhere asking that he does his makeup did not help.

Joochan sighed. What was he supposed to do now?

*******  
Sungyoon raised an eyebrow at Jibeom’s address.

_ How long do you plan on doing this?  
_ What hyung?  
_ Behave like an idiot.

The young man grimaced before shaking his head negatively.

_ I don’t know what to do, he finally admitted.  
_ What’s the problem? You get along with Joochan normally. You two are pretty easy to live with.  
_ I have…you know, I have…and Joochan has…and…uh…  
_ It is not clear at all.  
_ The… makeup I failed on Joochan, Jibeom breathed, eyes fixed on the ground.  
_ Failed? repeated Sungyoon, frowning.  
_ I apologized! assured his comrade at once. I should not have done his makeup, but I did not…  
_ Hey. Calm down. It wasn’t a failure at all. Joochan doesn’t blame you, said Sungyoon.  
_ He’s mad at me. I know he’s mad at me! I…  
_ He does not blame you, repeated Sungyoon, holding back from shaking Jibeom, which would certainly not help things given the state of semi-panic in which he was in.  
_ But he avoids me hyung.  
_ You’re the one avoiding him, idiot.  
_ I…

Sungyoon looked up to the sky. What was not to be heard… What had he done to deserve this? He pushed Jibeom into the nearest room and left for a few moments before pushing Joochan into the same room and closing the door.

_ …  
_ Jibeom-ah!  
_ … Hi?  
_ Hi? Hi?! What is…?  
_ I… um… I…  
_ Stay there! ordered Joochan seeing him heading for the door.  
_ … Joo, I… I’m really sorry… about the makeup, so I…  
_ Seriously?! In which language do I have to tell you that it was great? Even our fans liked it!  
_ But…  
_ There is no but!!  
_ I…

Joochan pushed him, annoyed and opted to prevent him from protesting in the first way that went through his head. Which explains why he ended up kissing his friend.  
Exactly.  
And it was really, really nice. He should have thought about this way of silencing him much earlier. It was effective. And nice. Where did Jibeom learn to kiss like that?

_ Anything to add?  
_ Again?  
_ Great idea.

He couldn’t say no to that either.  
Sungyoon closed the door he had opened a little to see if his 2 teammates were making progress. Just in case they would need a little help. But they seemed to be doing very well, actually.

_ So? asked Daeyeol.  
_ Well… I think they’ll stop avoiding each other.  
_ That’s all we ask of them.

Sungyoon wasn’t sure that Daeyeol had exactly thought the problem would solve itself this way when he asked him to do something with the 2 idiots, but anyway… It was settled, wasn’t it? He wasn’t responsible for the consequences.


	4. Uncertain

Uncertain

_ Nice song.

Joochan jumped and almost slammed the door that he was trying to close silently.

_ Oh hyung…  
_ But wouldn’t it be better to sing it to him when he’s awake?  
_ I’d rather not.  
_ Why not? Jibeom loves this kind of melody. He would like it.  
_ Maybe. But… I foolishly promised Jaehyun not to come between Jibeom and him. So…  
_ What right does he have to ask that?  
_ Hyung?  
_ What right does Jaehyun have to ask you to make you promise such a thing?  
_ I… am not sure. But he was so desperate that I ended up accepting.  
_ That was stupid.  
_ Completely. But I have no solution.  
_ Just tell him you don’t want it anymore.  
_ If it were that simple… I tried.  
_ And?  
_ He started to cry and I lost track of what I wanted to say.  
_ I see. But if he has a problem, let him solve it with the person concerned. Jibeom is not his property.  
_ I know, sighed Joochan.

Of course he knew that. Jaehyun was the one who need to hear that. And something told him he wouldn’t take it very well.

_ And Jibeom wracks his head to find out why you’re avoiding him.  
_ He told you about it hyung?  
_ Among other things. And even if he likes to tease Jaehyun, he can’t spend all his time with him. He will end up sending him off. Jaehyun does not seem to understand that he needs to interact with other people to keep a balance.  
_ Jibeomie said that?  
_ Not in those terms. But I don’t think he’s going to take it much longer. Remember the last time he tried to stuck himself to Jibeom?  
_ … No?  
_ Daeyeol had to put limits on him. Jibeom had completely closed off. You know how he is now. Calm and always ready to forgive. He does not like confrontations.  
_ This is true…

And they were all careful not to take advantage of that fact. Sometimes Jibeom would let too much go by and when he couldn’t take it anymore… let’s say it was better to be far away at that time. Joochan wasn’t ready to witness this kind of thing again, thank you very much.

_ You were not there when he arrived at Woollim, continued Sungyoon, but he was borderline savage. Clearly, he wasn’t used to being with strangers. And his accent...even I had trouble understanding it sometimes. It took us several months to get him out of this state, Daeyeol, Jangjun and me.  
_ Really? I... I just found him a bit… intimidating.  
_ Just stop avoiding him, okay?  
_ Aa. It’s bad for me anyway.  
_ And for the group. I’ll send Daeyeol to talk to Jaehyun. He doesn’t have to ask anyone for this kind of favor.  
_ I think he just likes Jibeom a lot.  
_ Jibeom is not in love with Jaehyun.  
_ Is that . . . hyung?  
_ That’s the crux of the matter, isn’t it?  
_ Aa. I think Jaehyun thinks that if he spends enough time with him, it will happen naturally. But Jibeom…  
_ No. Jaehyun can wait as long as he wants, Jibeom sees him as a little brother.  
_ You seem really sure…  
_ Don’t you too?  
_ I don’t know. Jibeom is unpredictable to me. It’s one of his qualities, but then it’s harder to know what he really thinks.  
_ Um.  
_ Good night hyung.

Sungyoon nodded distractingly, obviously thinking. It was a good time to escape and avoid disturbing questions! Sungyoon was too right about a lot of things and he didn’t want to think about it. A little more and he would have been able to make him admit that he had similar feelings as Jaehyun for their Busan boy. He wasn’t ready to admit that. At all. He just loved Jibeom’s company. His voice, his eyes, his hair, his way of smiling when he saw him in the morning, his smell, … Yeah, he was fucked. But nobody needed to know.

He finally went back to bed and tried to fall asleep, in vain. Too much was going through his head.

Jibeom had intrigued him as soon as he saw him, but he was intimidating and had not dared to approach him. Certainly in part because he had been traumatized by Jangjun the day before in the bathroom. This hyung was a case, really. Who did this kind of thing? Well, at least we couldn’t get bored with him. Neither with Jibeom, to tell the truth, but he understood that much later. Jibeom, once at ease became a whole other person and how not to become attached to him after that? Oh, he understood Jaehyun, even though he did not approve of him taking ownership of Jibeom in this way.

Daeyeol must have spoken with Jaehyun and Sungyoon to some of the other members, because in the following weeks, Jibeom found himself wandering from one member to another rather than exclusively alongside Jaehyun. If Jibeom had understood their trick, he did not comment, but Joochan noticed that he had made conscious efforts to tease Jaehyun and not to leave him sideway, so…

_ You know that it’s not by looking at him like this that it’s going to make things happen for you?  
Joochan jumped. How long Donghyun has been there? And what was he saying?

_ You are not very discreet, Joo, pointed out the young man.  
_ I was just thinking.  
_ You could invite him to eat chicken? Or ice cream. Our promotions are over for now, enjoy.  
_ Wh… what?  
_ Jibeom-ah, said Donghyun with a smirk. I am sure it would please him.

Faced with the lack of reaction from his friend, Donghyun drew him to Jibeom who was chatting with Sungyoon and pushed him towards him.

_ Can you take him for ice cream, Jibeom-ah? I’m not hungry and he’s been busting my ears with this for 2 hours.  
_ Hey! protested Joochan indignant.

But Jibeom burst out laughing and he could only smile.

_ Good idea, go ahead Jibeomie, you have nothing to do, said Sungyoon.  
_ But hyung, we were going to…  
_ Ah! I just remembered that I have to do something with Jangjun! Have fun!  
_ Hyung? murmured Jibeom as he watched him leave.  
_ Our hyungs are weird sometimes.  
_ Like you say. So, ice cream?  
_ Ice? Oh yes, ice cream! But you don’t have to. Uh… I…  
_ No, that’s good. I wanted to go out. Sungyoon-hyung was supposed to take me to the water park, but I think he had an emergency, huh?  
_ Hehe.  
_ And Donghyun too, what a coincidence.  
_ You…you think so?  
_ It’s good though, I have something to ask you, let’s go, Mister Hong.

What kind of trap did he fall into exactly? His 3 friends would not have dared to conspire for him to find himself there. Right?

_ Where are you going? asked Jaehyun, seeing them put on their shoes.  
_ Eat ice cream. Joochan generously invited me.

Joochan gave him an incredulous look. When exactly did he agree to pay? Jibeom gave him a smirk for answer and he capitulated. Why not after all.

_ Wait for me I’m coming with you!  
_ Jaehyun you stay here, called Daeyeol from the salon.  
_ But hyung, it’s ice cream.  
_ There’s some in the freezer.  
_ But they…  
_ They’re making too much noise. Come on, you two. Out.

Joochan did not hesitate and left immediately. Poor Jaehyun… But he preferred that he did not come with them.

_ We shall bring him a pot of it, said Jibeom, shrugging, not looking more disturbed than that by the intervention of their leader.  
_ Wouldn’t you rather he came with us?  
_ No. Not today. And he has a singing class in an hour. I don’t want to go home so early. Besides, it’s been pretty complicated for the others to get us both out of here, so we can’t waste their efforts.  
_ Complicated?  
_ Jaehyun didn’t exactly agree, sighed Jibeom. It’s the third time this week that hyung does this kind of thing. He doesn’t like sharing me with others.  
_ Ah… it’s true.  
_ But it’s worse with you, Joo, have you noticed?  
_ Now that you mention it.  
Indeed, whenever he wanted to speak with Jibeom, Jaehyun had encrusted himself. Hey! Jaehyun had instinct, he could not say anything else. He saw him as competition for Jibeom’s affection. Not like he had a chance with their Busan boy in the first place though.

Jibeom seemed to know exactly where he wanted to go. They took the subway and walked for a while to come in a small cafe he had never seen before. It was warm, a little secluded and quiet. Jibeom must have been a regular because the girl at the counter greeted him and he went to a table where no one could see them.

_ I came often before our debut, Jibeom said, answering his silent question. This is my refuge, so don’t tell the others. I come here to be alone.  
_ I’m with you right now though.  
_ Yep. Consider yourself honored and pay for the outing.  
_ Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuut!! Why do I have to pay?  
_ Because you avoided me like an idiot for no good reason according to Sungyoon-hyung.  
_ Oh… I guess so.  
_ Do you want to clear this up?  
_ No?

The waitress came to take their order, exchanging some jokes with Jibeom while passing by and observing Joochan with curiosity. This done, silence reigned for several minutes.

_ Do you intend to avoid me again for no reason in the near future? asked Jibeom finally.  
_ No. It was stupid. I didn’t think you’d notice.  
_ What about the songs?

Joochan felt a ball of anguish forming in his stomach. He could not know about the songs! No, no, no. He slept when he came to sing and Sungyoon-hyung… wouldn’t have told him? Hyung wouldn’t have done that… would he?

_ You’re gonna pretend this never happened? Really?  
_ I… it was… Sorry?  
_ I’m not asking you to apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong and it was nice to wait for my song before I fell asleep. I just want to know why. Or why you were avoiding me. One or the other. Well both if you feel like it.  
_ In fact, I had made some kind of… promise and then… uh… I don’t know why I started singing to you the little pieces of songs I sometimes compose. You had a bad day the first time, so I thought that since it was a lullaby, it would comfort you and help you sleep and… I just kept going like this.  
_ It was nice.  
_ Hu?  
_ The songs. I didn’t understand right away that it came from you, but the melody tended to stay in my head in the morning. Donghyun told me it was something you were working on when he heard me hum. He was surprised that you made me listen to it.  
_ Oh… Donghyun… that explains things.  
_ Like what, huh?

Joochan shrugged, reluctant to expose himself more than he had already done. He owed this explanation to Jibeom, but he had said enough.

_ Anyway. The next night Sungyoon-hyung came home late, I stayed up a little longer and I heard you sing.  
_ You didn’t say anything.  
_ You would have run away and I would have had no more song, replied Jibeom.  
_ Certainly, confessed Joochan, watching the waitress arrive with their cups of ice cream.

She wished them a good appetite then left them to their conversation and frozen concoctions. Joochan immediately swallowed a spoon. Apart from the stage and singing, he was never as happy as when he ate and it was delicious! He heard Jibeom laugh, but he could laugh! It was so good!

_ You put it everywhere Joochanie, pointed out his friend.  
_ You’re not eating? It’s gonna melt.  
_ Worry about your ice cream and let me watch you if I want to. I feel like I haven’t seen you this close in months.  
_ Um?  
_ That’s what happens when someone avoids you.

Jibeom mechanically wiped his cheek where he had managed to put chocolate ice cream and he felt his face warm, which seemed to delight his friend whose smile widened. Oh! He was bad there. Why did Jibeom lick his lips like that? It was not allowed this kind of thing!! Oh… Ice cream wasn’t a good idea at all. Although he could have done the same kind of thing with a chicken masher certainly and at least the ice cream vaguely cooled him down.

_ Isn’t that good, Joochanie? Do you want to taste mine? Almost purred Jibeom.

He mechanically nodded his head without understanding what he accepted and his brain short-circuited purely and simply when Jibeom handed him his spoon. To do add to it, Jibeom wiped the corner of his mouth with his thumb where some of his raspberry ice cream had landed.

_ Is it good?  
_ I… aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!! You do it on purpose!

Because really, it was not possible otherwise! Jibeom seemed to have too much fun there!! His friend replied with a smile coupled with a look that had nothing innocent.

_ Jibeom-ah!!  
_ Hehe. I confess. It’s a low revenge for agreeing to do what Jaehyun asked you to do.

He replied with a little pout. The jackal knew everything and had fun from the beginning.

_ Sungyoon-hyung gave me an absolutely fascinating theory this morning actually. And he particularly insisted that we were both congenital idiots unable to see beyond the tip of their noses.  
_ Hey! I don’t agree!  
_ Since when are you in love with me exactly Joochanie-ah?  
_ Fgyhhjjlllo.  
_ Yeah, I thought so. Personally, I noticed when you started avoiding me. Because it’s not normal to wake up thinking about someone on a regular basis, nor to miss that person while staying close. It is also not common to look at someone eating and wonder what they would taste like if they were kissed at the time and if it would be enough to divert them from the food. It’s not usual to want to pass your hand through your teammate’s hair all the time, or to have butterflies in your belly as soon as he touches you.

Joochan looked at him for long minutes, his eyes round like saucers, his mouth open, trying to assimilate what he had just heard. How could Jibeom say that kind of thing and stay so calm?

_ I managed to mute Hong Joochan! Wait, stay that way I’ll take a picture!

This was enough to make him close his mouth and reboot his recalcitrant brain. He thought carefully, trying to be honest with himself.

_ For a long time, he finally replied. Maybe even the first time I saw you in Woollim, but I didn’t want to admit it to myself. And then, Jaehyun…  
_ Leave Jaehyun out of this, will you? We don’t need a fifth wheel.  
_ So what do we... what do we do?  
_ We finish our ice cream that you will pay nicely as the charming boyfriend that you are and then we will go for a walk. I want to get some air. And if everything goes well, you’ll be allowed to kiss before going to bed tonight. Is that okay?

Joochan blinked. Boyfriend? Really? It wasn’t one of those weird dreams he used to have every now and then? No, it couldn’t, his dreams were a little more proactive. And this was much better there.

_ Can I have some more of your ice cream? he asked.

Jibeom laughed softly and pushed his cup toward him. Joochan plunged his spoon into it, promising not to kill that traitor Sungyoon-hyung who had told Jibeom everything. After all, the result exceeded his wildest hopes! He could not blame his hyung too much. He had done this to help them. He would have to think about thanking Donghyun and Daeyeol-hyung too. But not now. Right now he was going to enjoy being with Jibeom. Could he take his hand? As if he had been able to read his thoughts, his friend reached out to him and continued to look at him as he devoured their ice cream, seeming perfectly satisfied.


	5. Insomnia

Insomnia

_ Daeyeol-hyung!  
_ Jibeom-ah! What are you doing here?  
_ I grow flowers.  
_ You what?  
_ On my tablet hyung.

The older one raised an eyebrow before shaking his head. It was too late or too early in this case to try to understand.

_ It’s 4am, you know?  
_ I can’t sleep.  
_ That’s three nights in a row.  
_ I know.  
_ Why don’t you take something?  
_ I don’t respond very well to sleeping pills.  
_ You’re gonna have to find a way.  
_ Yes hyung.

Or at least he would do that when it started to be a problem. One of these days.  
In the meantime, he’d be playing on his tablet in a place where you wouldn’t see him going to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Which would be easier than figuring out how to sleep. At some point, he would certainly be so tired that he would fall asleep. Probably.

Meanwhile, he was growing flowers. And he could take his shower first, which was nice when we were 11. If he made breakfast, maybe Daeyeol-hyung would forget?  
Or not in fact because of the looks in the corner that he had received himself afterwards. That did not prevent him from dancing or singing. The fact was that they had a shoot the next day. A reality show for Chuseok. Or something like that. And it would be nice if he slept before that. This kind of filming was always … grueling.  
He was tired, no doubt. Except that he still couldn’t sleep. It was late. Or early, depending on how you look at it. He could listen to music until he was told to get up. He didn’t have much choice anyway: if Daeyeol saw him, he’d make a big deal out of it.

_ Jibeom-ah.  
_ Hyung? Is it time?  
_ Tell me you didn’t stay up all night with your eyes wide open listening to music.  
_ Of course not.

He closed his eyes from time to time. Did it count?

_ What are we going to do today hyung?  
_ Cooking, I think. And at least one photo shoot. We leave in an hour. The minibus is waiting for us.  
_ By bus? Not by car?  
_ By bus. You’d rather stay with your age friend, huh?  
_ It’s just more comfortable in the car.  
_ The bus is spacious.

He was not wrong. But he could sleep better in the car.

_ You’re not gonna wake up the other hyung?  
_ The others?  
_ The other members of Golden Child, O leader-nim.  
_ The members!!

Sometimes, Daeyeol was too easily distracted. To him the shower! Why did he come to wake him up first?

_ Can you help me Jibeom-ah?  
_ What are you doing hyung?  
_ For the moment they are all more asleep than awake, but once on the road, they will be hungry.

He nodded. Jaeseok was good to think about this kind of thing.

_ You look tired, Jibeomie.  
_ Thank you hyung.

Jaeseok laughed slightly and continued to distribute the preparations in the boxes while Jibeom took care of the rice.

_ Oh great! Food!  
_ Is everyone ready, Sungyoon?  
_ I’m not sure Bomin is up, but the others are on track.  
_ Good luck with that.  
_ Ouch, Jibeomie, did you sleep last night? You look like a digger.  
_ Have you ever seen one hyung? asked Jibeom with a smile.  
_ No real one, no, but you certainly seems like one.  
_ Aa. Daeyeol-hyung will end up knocking me out to make me sleep.  
_ This may not be a bad idea.  
_ You’ll excuse me if I’m not totally okay with this.  
_ This may be the last resort. Seriously, how long have you been awake?  
_ I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Unfortunately, his hyungs were not fooled. Not surprisingly, he was not a very good actor.

*****

_ It was a bit stupid to form a group where no one can cook, sighed Bomin.

They had just finished shooting the 'Chuseok Special' episode and were busy finishing the dishes they had prepared earlier.

_ It is not as if you were asked to do great cooking, replied Daeyeol, shrugging. And the three of you had a lot of fun, we could hear you laughing at the other end of the house.  
_ Where did Jibeom go? He didn’t even taste what we prepared.  
_ He left his ring there. He went to get it.  
_ Ah! I have it. I forgot to give it back.  
_ Bominie, you know that he must go crazy thinking he lost it. Why didn’t you return it to him right away?  
_ I know, I know. I’m gonna give it back. But Jibeom is H, right?  
_ Go and give him Bominie, insisted Jangjun.  
_ But this ring is an L, protested Bomin.  
_ If it’s the one Jibeom had, it’s his. Give it back.

Bomin scrunched up his face and turned to Daeyeol. The youngest loved to solve mysteries.

_ You want to check on Jaeseok and Joochan, Bominie? They can still do what they want, don’t you think?  
_ But hyung…  
_ It’s none of our business, Bomin.

This seemed to displease the young man greatly. He nevertheless let Jangjun take the ring from him and go in search of their teammate.  
He found him sitting on the floor in the room where they had prepared the songpyeons a little earlier.

_ Jibeom-ah? Look what I found. Bomin forgot to give it back to you.  
_ Oh… I thought I had lost it.  
_ I guess you know it’s not exactly yours?  
_ Hum…  
_ Does he know that?  
_ He… certainly forgot.  
_ Forgot?  
_ That we switched them.  
_ Nobody forgets that kind of thing, idiot. What’s the matter with you being depressed like that?  
_ Tiredness? I just feel sometimes… I don’t know what I can bring to the group.  
_ We’re not going back to that, Kim Jibeom!  
_ I’m just tired.  
_ Your insomnia again?

Jibeom shrugged, his eyes fixed on his ring once again on his finger. It was comforting to have it again.

_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ I know.  
_ I still have the pills from last time.

Jibeom grimaced. The pills made him sleep, yes, but it was not a good sleep. It literally knocked him out and nothing could wake him up for nearly 12 hours. Absolutely nothing. The awakening was sudden and disorienting. Really unpleasant. It took him a long time to recognize his environment and the people around him. It was… it wasn’t worth it.

_ I’d rather not.  
_ Did you try to sleep with someone?  
_ To? Hyung!!!!  
_ Not like that! Just to sleep! What will you think right now!  
_ … I don’t know what you mean.  
_ Yeeeah. Anyway, did you try to sleep with someone? In the van you fall asleep easily if you have someone next to you.  
_ Do I really?  
_ You never noticed that?  
_ I never paid attention.  
_ Hey! What are you two doing? Everyone is already putting on the hanboks. Is there a problem?  
_ Youngtaek-ah! Did you ate everything? asked Jangjun, jumping on the other rapper.

Jibeom followed them more slowly. When was the last time he slept? The night before in the van returning to the dormitory. And before that… in the van also on the way to a shoot. He knew that he slept better in the car but he had not made the correlation with the presence of his comrades. Jangjun may have put his finger on something.  
He had never thought of sleeping with someone, but if it worked, it was a possible solution.  
He let the stylists work around him. Sometimes he felt like a life-size doll to them, but anyway… It didn’t bother him specifically. His appearance had never been a priority for him anyway. He liked his clothes to be comfortable. The others were not entirely wrong in saying that he was the group’s fashion terrorist.

_ We match!  
_ Hmm? Ah… You’re purple too, Joochanie.  
_ You got the ring back?  
_ I shouldn’t have taken it off, but we had our hands in the dough…  
_ It couldn’t have gone far.  
_ Do you want it back?  
_ No. Yours brings me luck.

Jibeom blinked, not convinced. He was not a very lucky person. If Joochan wanted to boost his luck, he should turn to Bomin. For his part, he liked having something belonging to his friend.  
They resumed filming. This part was not too complicated for him: he had only to sit quietly next to Joochan and smile. They were going to have a few days off after that, which was going to be good for everyone. Jibeom had every intention of enjoying an empty dormitory. And if he could sleep, it would be even better.

Jangjun tried to make him sleep as soon as they settled into the minibus, but it didn’t really work despite all his efforts. Yet he was really tired. Who was he sitting with when he fell asleep the night before? Joochan? Or Youngtaek? No, Youngtaek was next to Seungmin. He had a vague memory of blond hair, so definitely Joochan. It was consistent. He felt more comfortable with Joochan than with the other members. Which was rather strange because he doubted that the opposite was true and Jaehyun remained his best friend.  
_ I swear, if you don’t sleep in five minutes, I’ll give you the pills when we get home Jibeom.  
_ But you’re full of energy hyung. I can’t sleep if you keep moving.

Jangjun frowned and turned his head to find another target to play pillows for Jibeom. Jaehyun was eating, so no. But maybe… Who was Jibeom’s ring again? Jaeseok or Joochan? Jaeseok was talking to Daeyeol, but Joochan was sleepy, he could take his place!  
Jibeom watched him drag Joochan to his place with great reinforcement of preposterous statements.

_ But what’s wrong with him now? asked the blond once he sat down.  
_ Who knows. I gave up understanding 2 weeks after meeting him.

Joochan took his hand, playing distractingly with his ring, seeming to think seriously about it, and the bus finally moved.

_ Jibeomie-ah?  
_ He’s asleep! Well done Joochanie! said Jangjun.  
_ Hey?  
_ He has insomnia again, explained the young man.  
_ Ah? But he sleeps now.  
_ Yep. My hypothesis is that he gets to sleep when he has someone with him.  
_ Original. At least he has 10 possible candidates.  
_ Except he couldn’t sleep with me.

Joochan snorted. Was it really surprising? Jangjun was a real ball of energy.

_ Don’t laugh. I wasn’t moving. So my new theory is that it’s special to some people.  
_ This is not a scientific experiment hyung.  
_ Or maybe it’s just you.  
_ What are you doing? asked Donghyun from the back seat.  
_ Jangjun-hyung speculates on Jibeom’s sleeping habits.  
_ Oh. His insomnia?  
_ Did you notice too Donghyunie?

Donghyun glanced at his sleeping friend and smirked. Jibeom looked peaceful with his head set on Joochan’s shoulder and his hands tangled with the blond’s.

_ I think it works with Sungyoon-hyung too. But Jaeseok-hyung has a technique to make him sleep, you should have asked him. Although putting Joochan in stuffed animal mode also works fine.  
_ So it’s Joochanie, said Jangjun, nodding his head. Wait! How does Jaeseok-hyung know how to do it?!

Donghyun gave him a big smile.

_ You know how Donghyun? asked Joochan visibly at ease in his role of stuffed animal for the moment.

If they didn’t have their belts, Donghyun wondered if Jibeom would have ended up on Joochan’s lap. And the two boys didn’t even realize it. At the very beginning, when they met, he had a little crush on Joochan, but he quickly turned it into a friendship. He was not crazy and had no intention of getting his heart broken. For him, it was clear that there was something special between Jibeom and Joochan. Now… if the 2 main people involved could also be aware of it... Although it was fun to watch. Most of the time anyway.

_ Remember when we shot the episode in Jeju for Woolim Pick? Jaeseok-hyung shared his room with Jibeom and he couldn’t sleep.  
_ Oh. Hyung found out. What did he do?  
_ You may not remember, Joochan, but he came to borrow a sweatshirt.  
_ It’s possible, said the blond.

Obviously, the younger one didn’t see the connection, but Jangjun nodded. It had something to do with Joochan. He was a little jealous, but well, since it allowed Jibeom to sleep…

_ Does it work with Sungyoon-hyung too?  
_ I’m not sure.  
_ Hey! Explain to me!!!

Poor Joochan seemed a little lost, but Jibeom moved slightly and that was enough to silence him.

_ It’s not important, Joochanie. You should sleep too.

The blond replied with a sullen pout before settling down more comfortably and closing his eyes.  
Jangjun winked at Donghyun and sat down properly next to Youngtaek.

_ You’re done with your shenanigans?  
_ For the moment.  
_ You should let them figure it out, you know? As long as it doesn’t affect the band, it’s better that they settle it between them.  
_ You didn’t see how tired Jibeom was? He was almost in tears earlier. He hadn’t slept for several days.  
_ Oh. Again? I thought he settled that?  
_ It would appear not.  
_ I’m always the last one to know, Youngtaek muttered.  
_ He knows how to be forgotten whenever he wants.  
_ Too well if you ask me. And he talks less to me now that he’s with the 99liners.  
_ You have Seungminie.  
_ Um.

Maybe he missed Jibeom? Nothing prevented him from seeking his company. Except that Jibeom himself had avoided him for a long time. He didn’t like to call him 'hyung'. It had amused Jangjun a lot at first, but after a while it was a bit sad. Instead of using bypasses to avoid calling Youngtaek 'hyung', Jibeom ended up not calling him at all, fixing his problem. That Joochan and Donghyun no longer use honorifics did not seem to disturb him.

_ Anyway, let them sort out the rest.  
_ It’s distracting. And they’re really adorable.  
_ Adorable, yes. And fools at will.  
_ They are young. Have you never been in love Youngtaek?  
_ No. Not like that. What they have is more than a silly high school crush or a love at first sight disappearing the following week.  
_ Too bad they don’t realize it.  
_ They will. They are in no hurry.  
_ They’re both really cute. Why didn’t I notice it before?  
_ Because you weren’t paying attention. Can I sleep now?  
_ Sleep? But we’re almost there! You can sleep in the dormitories! Keep me company!  
_ Do you ever get tired?  
_ Yes!

Youngtaek would have liked to take advantage of this hour of travel to sleep for his part. But he had no special choice.  
Jibeom opened his eyes when he felt that someone was trying to move him. He was so well where he was though…

_ Sssh. Go back to sleep, Jibeomie, I’ll take you to the dorm.

It was the voice of Sungyoon-hyung. If Sungyoon carried him, he was safe, he could sleep. But something prevented him from doing so. Something was missing? Sungyoon-hyung gave him a soft object and he calmed down. Hyung had found what was missing. He could always trust him.

_ This is impressive, said Jangjun.  
_ I could have carried him, mumbled Joochan, clearly half asleep.  
_ It’s not Donghyun, Joochan.  
_ I can carry him, the blond insisted.  
_ When you’re awake and it’s not more than 10 seconds, maybe, gently mocked Donghyun, pushing him forward.

Jibeom had slept until 8am the next day. This was the equivalent of sleeping in for him, especially after a full night. He didn’t know exactly how Jangjun did it, but it worked. And now he had three days to lounging in the dormitory. He had, for the moment at least, no intention of moving.

_ Awakened the groundhog? said Daeyeol when he saw him coming out of the room which he shared with Sungyoon.  
_ I slept well!  
_ No way? I already told you, but warn when you have prolonged insomnia Jibeom. It can be dangerous, you know?  
_ I was still functional, protested the young man.  
_ Next time, just sleep with Joochan, it will solve the problem.  
_ Joochanie?

Daeyeol smirked before handing him the cereal packet. Jibeom resigned himself to not getting more answers and shrugged. Perhaps he had slept with Joochan. He remembered getting on the bus with Jangjun and… nothing more. He had to fall asleep in the bus and someone had carried him to his bed.

_ Are you going to your parents hyung?  
_ Yes. I plan to spend my Chuseok in bed.  
_ This is not a bad project, approved the youngest. Everyone has already left?  
_ Oh no. Just Jaeseok, Sungyoon, Jaehyun and Youngtaek. The others are still asleep.  
_ They don’t have to meet a timetable? For the train or the bus?  
_ No idea. It’s the holidays, they can do whatever they want. When are you leaving?  
_ Where?  
_ You’re not going to see your family in Busan?  
_ I’m staying here.  
_ You’re staying here? Alone?  
_ It’s gonna be quiet for once.  
_ Are you sure you want to stay here alone?  
_ Why not? I promise not to set the dormitory on fire.  
_ That’s not what I’m worried about, idiot.  
_ What is it then hyung?  
_ I don’t like the idea of you being alone for Chuseok. Why don’t you go see your family?  
_ They invited a lot of people, so my room is taken because they didn’t think I would go home.  
_ Oh. I see.  
_ It does not bother me hyung. I need calm and sleeping a little more will not hurt me.  
_ I’m not sure. For calm and solitude I mean.  
_ It’s okay. I lived alone before I came to Woollim you know? I’ll be fine. It’s not for long.

Daeyeol frowned, not convinced, but he could not force him. The others had not yet emerged when Daeyeol left the dormitory and Jibeom suddenly found himself idle. The dishes were done. The dormitory was relatively clean and he had nothing to do except watch movies or go back to bed.  
Both were possible. Even both at the same time. Sleep in front of a drama? With the couch for himself? Seemed like a great idea.

Joochan and Donghyun emerged at ¾ of the second episode of ‘When you were sleeping’, but he was too busy with the drama to really pay attention to them. At least until they decided to take his legs as a seat. Tss. He was supposed to have the dormitory to himself! Why were they invading it?

_ Shouldn’t you be somewhere? Somewhere else than wallowing in my couch, I mean.  
_ Not immediately, Donghyun said with a big smile.  
_ What episode is it? asked Joochan.  
_ The third is about to begin.  
_ I only saw the first one. Can you put the second one back?  
_ No.  
_ Please, pretty please?  
_ Don’t you have to get ready to go see your family?  
_ They pick me up in the afternoon.  
_ By the way, put on the 1, I have not seen this series, said Donghyun.  
_ You are tiring, said Jibeom before relaunching the first episode.

And since they forced him to look again, Joochan could lend him his knees to serve as a pillow. The blond did not protest and even passed his hand in his hair, which suited very well to Jibeom who soon fell asleep.

_ How many nights late do you think he’s been?  
_ Who knows. It’s impressive how fast he falls asleep.  
_ Do I have a soporific effect on him or something?  
_ No. It’s more like... um... I’d say he feels safe with you.  
_ Oh. Why is that?  
_ How would I know? Ask him.

He wasn’t sure that Jibeom knew. Or that he would answer him if he did. Jangjun and Seungmin joined them a few minutes later, gently teasing Joochan, but not making Jibeom move to have room on the couch. Jangjun still took a picture of them, knowing perfectly well that Joochan would not move immediately. They watched the show with them for lunch, then went to prepare to leave.

_ You three are leaving this afternoon?  
_ My train leaves at 5pm.  
_ My parents will pick me up around 6-8pm  
_ What about Jibeom?  
_ He didn’t say anything.  
_ Does he go home? asked Seungmin.  
_ But he should be gone by now if he was.  
_ Oh…  
_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ Nnh?  
_ Don’t you have a train to catch?  
_ 'Stay here, he mumble before he snuggles a little more against Joochan.

Jangjun shrugged. Jibeom must have planned something. Certainly. Just not right away. He and Seungmin left soon after, leaving the younger to their series.  
Donghyun left around 3pm, letting Joochan to persuade Jibeom not to stay alone for Chuseok. None of them were happy to learn that their friend had planned to stay alone in the dormitory for this period, but Donghyun had to surrender or else miss his train.

_ Are you sure you want to be alone?  
_ I intend to use all the hot water, eat what I want, and watch what I want on the TV lying on the couch without having to fight for the remote, Jibeom said.  
_ But all alone…  
_ Don’t keep your parents waiting, Joo.

Yeah, yeah, but he didn’t like leaving Jibeom alone at all. He was very careful not to tell them in advance, because he knew perfectly well that none of them would agree with that. Moreover, Jibeom had told him to leave, but he still had his head on his knees.

_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ Um?  
_ Do you… want to come with me?  
_ Where is that?  
_ Eating with my parents and at home afterwards.

Jibeom remained silent for a while, seeming to think seriously about it.

_ I don’t think that’s a good idea.  
_ I…  
_ And I need a little loneliness.  
_ Ah…  
_ Thank you for asking Joochanie.  
_ I’ll be home tomorrow night then.  
_ Enjoy your family.  
_ Huhu. You don’t think you can get rid of me like that, do you?  
_ I would never dare.  
_ Don’t even try.  
_ You’re really gonna be late.  
_ I know.  
_ What are you waiting for?  
_ I don’t like leaving you alone.  
_ You have no choice.  
_ I could kidnap you.  
_ I’m not dressed and I don’t want to move.  
_ Tss.

Nevertheless, he had to decide to give up. Jibeom was right, he didn’t have the time and pulling that mule head out was an impossible mission.

He hadn’t stayed long after all. Because his sister and father were at odds over something he hadn’t really grasped, spending the evening and the next day in heated discussions. If we could call their screams a conversation. And then, really, he was uncomfortable with the idea of having left Jibeom alone in the dormitory, even though his friend had said that the situation suited him.  
He had therefore returned to the dormitory in the late afternoon, almost expecting to find Jibeom exactly where he had left him on the couch.

_ Joochaniiiiiiiiiiiiiie!!!  
_ What is …?  
_ Come play with me!

He certainly did not expect to receive Jibeom in his arms as soon as he crossed the door. And, in fact, he had never seen Jibeom behave that way.

_ Have you been drinking?  
_ I couldn’t sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep !!  
_ Where did you get alcohol?  
_ Noooooooooo! I drank the soda of Daeyeol-hyung!  
_ The soda he told us not to touch?  
_ It’s not even good!  
_ Because it’s not soda. It’s a mixture of beer and soju.  
_ It’s not good, though!

Okay, Jibeom drunk was fun, but a real dead weight.

_ Why did you drink it if you didn’t like it?  
_ I wanted to taste it?  
_ Are you asking me?  
_ Yes?  
_ How should I know?  
_ You don’t know?

It seemed to confuse him.

_ To annoy hyung maybe?  
_ Oh…

He burst out laughing and headed for the couch before turning around and grabbing his comrade’s hand to take him with him in front of the TV.

_ This is Jangjun’s console? He’s gonna kill you.  
_ Uh uh. I called him to ask him!  
_ You called him in your state?  
_ What kind of state?

Joochan sighed. In the future, he would keep Jibeom away from alcohol.

_ Joochanie-ah? Your hair is all shiny…  
_ Blond, yes.  
_ This is nice.  
_ You said it was weird when I bleached them.  
_ It looks good on you.  
_ You are drunk.  
_ Yeaaaaaaaaaah!!  
_ And it amuses you…

He just laughed and would have fallen if Joochan hadn’t stabilized him.

_ You wouldn’t want to go to bed, would you?  
_ With you, huh?

But what could he possibly have in his head? It was a bit unsettling to see him like that. Not that it bothered him to sleep with Jibeom. But he did not look tired. Rather energetic even. Maybe playing the console would be a better idea, but… he would be able to hurt himself.

_ You want to sleep?  
_ Noooooooooooooo.  
_ We could watch a drama.  
_ Ok ok ok ok.

That had been the plan. Letting him choose the drama had been... hazardous. He had not expected a romantic drama. Much less to have to deal with a Jibeom in tears because the heroine was a ghost and had little chance of survival. Jibeom ended up falling asleep almost sitting on his knees and his head in his neck.  
So, in short, Jibeom drunk particularly liked cuddling in addition to tearful dramas.  
Aside from that, it wasn’t unpleasant? He hadn’t had the opportunity to be with Jibeom much lately. To tell the truth, sometimes he almost felt like Jibeom was avoiding being alone with him, which was a bit strange.  
Well… He might as well put him to bed. He had no desire to sleep in this position. Jibeom was not exactly a light weight, but he willingly agreed to let himself be directed to bed.  
_ You know I’m gonna be able to tease you for months, right?  
_ Um?  
_ You really can’t hold your liquor, Jibeom-ah.  
_ What liquor?

He laid him on his own bed because, really, he could not see himself carrying him all the way upstairs.

_ Is it time for bed?  
_ Exactly.  
_ Am I dreaming?  
_ Not yet. Give me a second.

Which actually seemed complicated. Jibeom gave him a funny smile and whispered something he did not grasp before he pressed him against him and kissed him.  
Which was absolutely not foreseen in the plan!! He had not planned to appreciate it either! Where the hell did Jibeom learn to kiss like that?

_ Wa… wait!  
_ Joochanie, Joochanie, Joochanie.

What could he do? He had to stop him, didn’t he? It was the right thing to do. Absolutely. Even if Jibeom kissed him and rubbed himself against him and was making him lose his head. What he felt had nothing to do with his solo experiences… really nothing to do with that, it was not comparable. But Jibeom didn’t know what he was doing. Well, he did. He obviously knew what he was doing. But he was drunk. He would have done the same with any of their teammates…

_ Jibeom-ah… stop… wait a little…

Surprisingly, he obeyed immediately.

_ Joochanie…

Okay… hearing him moan his name that way, strangely, it didn’t help.

_ Look, we don’t…  
_ You want to stop?  
_ I…  
_ I thought… I mean… I didn’t want to force you.

Ah… he made him cry…

_ Wait! Wait! You didn’t force me!  
_ …  
_ Jibeom-ah?

Really? He had gone back to sleep? Now?! After putting him in such a state!! And besides, he wouldn’t let him go so he could go and fix his little… problem. It promised a good night’s sleep that…  
But in the end, he had fallen asleep because he woke up several hours later to a Jibeom who was awake, obviously sober and of a beautiful crimson hue.

_ Please tell me what happened yesterday was a dream.  
_ Not a chance. You’re lucky it wasn’t Daeyeol-hyung who found you like this.  
_ He would have just put me to bed.  
_ That’s what I’ve been trying to do! And you’ve… uh…  
_ Ah… uh… sorry about that. I didn’t mean to assault you or…  
_ You just drank too much, that’s okay.  
_ I don’t have to be drunk to want to kiss you.

He couldn’t be completely awake, in fact, because what he heard could not correspond to reality, could it?

_ Jibeomie?  
_ On the other hand… if you could… um… move a little? On the side.  
_ Oh! Yes, yes!

His little problem had not been solved during the night. Jibeom’s problem had not been solved ever. It was a bit awkward. Until Jibeom burst out laughing.

_ It’s not funny, Jibeom-ah!  
_ A little bit. My experience is a complete fail as well. I wanted to see if drinking would make me sleep, but since you were here, you’re still making me sleep.  
_ …  
_ I wish it was a dream.  
_ Do you have dreams like that?  
_ Sure. It happens to me, like everyone else.  
_ With me, huh?

Jibeom hesitated, carefully considering the question.

_ With you. Most of the time.  
_ Do you really?  
_ I didn’t realize it, but… yes, it’s you most often.  
_ Why is that?  
_ You looked at yourself into a mirror? Besides, you are always in my field of vision. Is that so surprising?  
_ I never thought about it. We’re all attractive and we literally live on top of each other.  
_ Forget it if it bothers you. I can promise you it won’t happen again.

Forget? He had good ones! How was he supposed to forget that? Just a glance at his friend made him want to kiss him. Oh… he wanted to kiss him. Why did it happen now? He had never thought of kissing Jibeom before. Or not for long. Maybe once or twice. Or three. Anyway!

Jibeom seemed to think it was settled, but it wasn’t. He wasn’t allowed to be so cute when he ate his cereal… He was not allowed to leave the bathroom with his shirt off because he had left it in his room… He had no right to fall asleep on him in front of the TV either…  
It wasn’t good for his mental health!

_ The others are coming back tomorrow. It’s not long 3 days to rest. I hope they have rested well.  
_ Um.  
_ It’s fortunate you came back in fact, I still can’t sleep alone. I would have been even more tired than before Chuseok.  
_ Um.  
_ Otherwise, Donghyun proposed a striptease party for tomorrow with Jangjun-hyung and Daeyeol-hyung in the spotlight, what do you think?  
_ Hmm. Huh?! What?  
_ Oh well, you were actually listening to me.  
_ Sorry. Yirk! Where did you get the idea of stripping? I’m going to be traumatized for life just by the idea.  
_ Poor thing. Like you haven’t seen them naked before.  
_ I’m not looking!  
_ Of course not.  
_ Kim Jibeom! I’m not looking!!  
_ Maybe you should.  
_ I do not…  
_ I’m tired. Lend me your knees, will you?  
_ Tss.

He nevertheless let him settle down as he wished.

_ Are you looking yourself?  
_ What is it?  
_ Jangjun-hyung and…  
_ No, not really.  
_ And you also dream that you … kiss others?

Because he was concerned. He didn’t like imagining Jibeom with anyone else. If he could just… what exactly? Get him to kiss only him?

_ Um… I dreamt that I kissed Sungyoon-hyung once, but it wasn’t exactly the same circumstances as with you. And that was a long time ago. And... um... why are you asking me this? Didn’t we decide to forget?  
_ You decided on your own.  
_ What then?  
_ You didn’t drink now.  
_ No. I leave this stuff to hyung. It’s not great and it doesn’t make me sleep.  
_ So you’re not drunk.  
_ Joochan-ah?  
_ So I can kiss you without feeling like I’m taking advantage of you.

Jibeom sat down normally, watching his friend carefully. Did his lack of sleep make him delirious or did Joochan ask him to kiss him? He seemed serious.

_ This is not a game Joochanie. I know the circumstances are against me in this case, but I don’t kiss anyone.  
_ It’s a good thing, assured the young man, getting closer, me neither.  
Jibeom found nothing to reply to that. Not that he could have said anything anyway, his lips were much too busy!!

Daeyeol returned at the end of the evening to the dormitory, expecting to find animation, but everything was silent. Jangjun beckoned him to shut up when he saw him and pointed to the couch where Jibeom and Joochan slept before returning to his camera.  
Joochan was supposed to have spent his holidays with his parents and only come back tomorrow morning… Daeyeol wondered for a moment if he had spent all his time hugging Jibeom on the couch before telling himself that he did not want to know. Jibeom was asleep and had obviously made up for his sleep delay and found an accessible sleeping pill with no side effects. What more could you ask for? Of course, that was before he went through the kitchen and discovered the corpses of bottles containing his secret reserve of beer…

_ Kim Jibeom!!!!!!


	6. Flowers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story takes place in a world where flowers appear in the form of tattoos in response to strong feelings for another person.
> 
> Meaning of the flowers:  
> • Gloxinia: Love at first sight.  
> • Honeysuckle or Lonicera: Deep friendship, sincere love, eternal bonds.  
> White honeysuckle: Bonds of friendship.  
> Pink honeysuckle: Bonds of love.  
> • Freesia: Love, elegance and grace.  
> White Freesia: Declaration of Love.  
> Freesia rose: Shy request of love.  
> (cr: http://www.homejardin.com)

Flowers

Jibeom glared at the flowers standing proudly on his right hip, part of his thigh and now part of his belly. It was supposed to fade, not spread out!! It had been going on for almost 4 years, he wanted to get rid of it. Why didn’t his feelings want to go and those damn flowers with them?

_ Jibeom-ah? Are you done with the bathroom?  
_ 2 minutes.

The time to hide this monstrosity. If his feelings were share, he assumed that these flowers would disturb him less. Or if they were there because of someone else… like Jaehyun who had a pretty white freesia branch on his left forearm. It would have been perfect and so much simpler if it had been Jaehyun.

His only consolation was that his flowers were easy to hide. He did not know what he would have done if it had been on his face. In his case, he usually managed to hide them. But in recent months, instead of fading and disappearing, the only little flower he had at first grew, grew and multiplied. The others were bound to see them. He had been lucky until then.

_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ Um… Sorry hyung. Was I long?  
_ No, no. I’m just in a hurry. Donghyun took the other bathroom from under my nose.  
_ Ah. He goes fast when the bathroom is in play.  
_ Do you feel fine Jibeomie? You…  
_ I’m fine, ensured the youngest. Just not very well awake.

He walked away, letting Youngtaek into the room. He wanted to go for a ride before going to his singing class. He ignored Jaehyun as he passed and came out of the dormitory. He loved Jaehyun, he was his best friend, but he would wisely wait for his flowers to fade and he could become just his friend again.

At the moment, he was acting like a possessive boyfriend and kept blaming him. Most certainly because he did not react as he wanted. But just because he had flowers on his arm for him didn’t necessarily mean he had to return his feelings. It wasn’t an obligation. He tried to explain it to his teammate, but strangely, all the members looked at him as if he had three heads or something.

He wasn’t unreasonable or anything. He was just in love with someone else. There was nothing wrong with that. At least from his point of view. One day he was going to crack…

_ Jibeom-ah! We’re going to the studio to rehearse, want to come? asked Joochan.

He felt a pinch as he saw Joochan and Donghyun side by side and felt his flowers burning for a short time.

_ I wanted to ride a little before.  
_ Cycling! immediately approved Joochan.  
_ No, Joo, we promised to review the chore.  
_ … But we’re not in such a hurry, are we?  
_ Joochan…  
_ I come, Jibeom intervened. I have to review the last chore too.  
_ Oh… Are you sure? We can…  
_ I’ll ride my bike tonight, he said.

He didn’t want to hear one of the DongChan special fights right now and if they hung around too much, Jaehyun would join them. Nor did he want to be stunned by all kinds of reproaches.

He had managed to avoid this all morning. Because Jaehyun had arrived exactly when he was leaving for his singing class. He felt a little guilty when he looked disappointed, but he couldn’t handle it right now.

Of course, his relative peace could not last. Not with the huge assembly of gloxinias clearly saying ‘Love At First’ on his hip. With their activities resuming, it was only a matter of time, luck, or bad luck.  
Like, sharing a room with Donghyun.  
He released his guard because Donghyun was not invasive. It was simple with Donghyun. You just had to make sure you kept your space clean and didn’t leave anything lying around. Donghyun didn’t like mess.

So… he took a shower on his way back from their performances while Donghyun was squatting in Joochan and Sungyoon’s room. At his service, he thought he was alone for some time. And he was really exhausted. He had not closed the bathroom door. Because Donghyun had already showered and he wasn’t there anyway. He didn’t lock the door, it was useless. And he left his pajamas on his bed, which shouldn’t have mattered since Donghyun wasn’t supposed to be in the bedroom.  
Unfortunately, either he had been very, very long in the shower, or Donghyun had been quick because his friend was currently in the bathroom and was looking at him with round eyes. Or rather the eyes fixed on his gloxinias. He could not miss them.

_ I… I forgot my sweater.  
_ Are you going to stare at me for a long time? he asked him for form.  
_ You … it’s … gloxinia?  
_ I know Donghyun.

He came out of the shower and wrapped himself in a towel.

_ Why didn’t you say anything? And… since when?  
_ Can I get dressed?

Donghyun followed him as if he expected him to run away at the first opportunity. It was a bit awkward, but well… he didn’t have exactly the choice. Donghyun seemed fascinated by the flowers on his hip, without much surprise.

_ Dongdongie?  
_ I’ve never seen gloxinias on anyone… you have plenty …  
_ This is quite rare.  
_ They are really pretty.  
_ Thank you?  
_ For whom?  
_ …  
_ It is not a good idea to keep it hidden Jibeom-ah. We are a group, we must not hide this kind of thing.  
_ This is personal.  
_ … That should, I agree, but it’s not possible Jibeom-ah. Don’t you trust us?  
_ Of course … I know. I thought if I ignored it long enough, it would wither and disappear.  
_ They look fine.  
_ I know…  
_ How long have they been here?  
_ Um… just under 4 years old.  
_ 4 years!?  
_ 3 ½ ?  
_ It’s the same! They’re not gonna leave, you fool! I bet it’s one of the members!

Donghyun was a little too perceptive for his taste. He wasn’t going to lecture him, was he?

_ In the beginning, there was only one. The size of a ping-pong ball. But I feel that the more I ignore it, the more it spreads. Since… Genie, I think, it’s getting worse.  
_ It’s possible. I’m not going to pretend to know anything about it. You didn’t say who?  
_ Is it important?  
_ Did you told him? asked Donghyun, changing tactics.  
_ Of course not. Do you know what a gloxinia means Donghyun? Do you think I can go see him with this damn flower?! That he won’t feel forced? That he won’t feel pity?  
_ You… Jibeomie, you can’t know until you try. You don’t have to show him the gloxinias right away.  
_ And that’s not what you wanted me to do five minutes ago? Show them to the whole band?  
_ So he’s in the band.  
_ Donghyun! Why do you insist? I won’t die if he never knows.  
_ So do I call the others?  
_ … You’re a pain in the ass. Do whatever you want.  
_ It’s Joochan, huh?  
_ What…?

How did he do that? He didn’t say anything that would connect him to Joochan!

_ Love at first sight. 3 ½years. In the group. The choice is narrower than you seem to believe.  
_ That’s right. I haven’t given it enough thought.

And it was also the first time he talked about it with someone. It was liberating somehow. Donghyun was an attentive ear and his friend.

_ Joo has a flower too.  
_ What?

He must have heard wrong, didn’t he? Not surprisingly, Joochan was full of feelings. That’s what made him such a good singer. He just didn’t consider facing this kind of situation in the near future. Maybe his gloxinias would listen to reason after that?

_ Pink honeysuckle on the heart, said Donghyun after a slight hesitation.  
_ Who? asked Jibeom, not sure to want to know, but unable to prevent the question from coming out of his mouth.  
_ He’s been less specific than you and it hasn’t been as long that he has them.  
_ Ok.  
_ Ok?  
_ Go tell them I have a garden of gloxinias on my hip. I’m going to sleep.  
_ Jibeomie.  
_ Good night.

Donghyun sighed and went back to Sungyoon and Joochan’s room. They had to wonder what he was doing. He was supposed to come back much faster.

_ You got lost? Sungyoon joked.  
_ I saw a flowerbed of multicolored gloxinias.

The strange statement was enough to interrupt Joochan in emptying his pack of chips.  
_ In the hotel?  
_ In my room.  
_ Did someone deliver flowers to you?  
_ Joo, we don’t offer gloxinias to a stranger. It’s not just found anywhere either, and certainly not in a hotel room.  
_ But then?  
_ What’s in Donghyun’s room?  
_ Some flowers?  
_ Who is in Donghyun’s room, Joochanie? asked Sungyoon with a smile.  
_ Jibeomie. Oh…  
_ But gloxinias, really?  
_ Yep. Gorgeous. I’ve never seen one before. He’s got plenty on his right side on his belly, hip and thigh.  
_ The little minx. Since when?  
_ 3 ½years.  
_ Oh!

Joochan had whitened, instinctively holding a hand to his heart, which escaped none of his teammates who exchanged a smirk. What an interesting development!

_ It’s amazing he’s been able to hide this for so long.  
_ He said it was small at first, but it’s huge now.  
_ Someone from the agency certainly. Some lucky guy. Gloxinias. It’s the rarest flower.

Sungyoon seemed to be having fun.

_ He said who? asked Joochan in a small voice, his pack of chips completely forgotten.  
_ Of course not. He hid his flowers for more than 3 years, he wasn’t ready to tell me this kind of detail. I had to guess!  
_ And he let you tell us?  
_ For the gloxinias. After having shocked him by talking about Joochan’s honeysuckle.  
_ Donghyun-ah!! You promised!  
_ He has gloxinias Joochan.  
_ And it was not for you to tell us. Just as you were not allowed to talk about my honeysuckle without my permission. It’s personal, Donghyun, you don’t seem to understand that.  
_ I…most people are not embarrassed by their flowers.  
_ I know. But when they appear hidden, it is often with reason.  
_ Sorry… it’s just… these gloxinias, they are necessarily for…  
_ Donghyun!!! Sungyoon said.  
_ But they’re stupid hyung!  
_ Let them be stupid. That’s their right. You wouldn’t want to be forced if you were in their shoes.  
_ I suppose not, finally breathed the young man. But… Joo? Your flowers, are they not for Jibeomie?  
_ I…I…

He glanced in panic at Sungyoon, who shrugged his shoulders.

_ When you know what to look at, it’s obvious.  
_ Did you tell Jibeom, Donghyun-ah?  
_ No. I won’t tell him.  
_ He has enough already with Jaehyun, sighed Joochan, relieved.  
_ No, but you need to tell him yourself, Joo.  
_ You just told me he’s had gloxinias… like, several gloxinias… for 3 ½years. I understand why he’s pushing Jaehyun away.  
_ But 3 ½ years Joo! Someone who must be in the group since he sees him regularly enough for his gloxinias to multiply.  
_ How should I know? I had just arrived at that time.  
_ But exactly, dummy!!  
_ … ?  
Sungyoon sighed. Donghyun was going to get really upset, but Joochan wasn’t ready to consider that these gloxinias were there in reaction to their first meeting.

_ Maybe Youngtaek-hyung?  
_ That’s right, yes. And your honeysuckles are there for Bominie.  
_ … It’s almost revolting. I don’t see Bominie like that at all.  
_ What if he finally accepts Jaehyun? You’ll be okay too?  
_ He… doesn’t seem to want to do that? And what do you want me to do Donghyun? For him to break my heart, too?  
_ He cannot break your heart, contradicted Donghyun immediately.  
_ Why not?  
_ The Honeysuckle literally means ‘Deep Friendship’. It is the basis of how you feel about him Joochanie.

Joochan nodded his head with a big smile on his face. Indeed, that’s how it started. In fact, for the first few weeks, his honeysuckles were white. Then they slowly turned pink. It’s been a few months now… somewhere during Genie’s promotion. And it had evolved since then. It certainly wasn’t going to fade right away. He didn’t want them to actually wither. He loved them. Very much.  
It was largely Jibeom’s help that kept his spirits up as he recovered from his knee injury. Then the honeysuckles had only developed and flourished. Jibeom being Jibeom, it could not be otherwise, could it?

_ Joochan-ah? Are you still with us?  
_ Um?  
_ Do you still want to watch a movie?  
_ Movie? Oh yes. The movie. I…  
_ Do you want to go to sleep?  
_ I don’t think I can sleep right now.

He also did not have the head to watch a film to tell the truth. He was a little too focused to Jibeom and his gloxinias. Maybe Donghyun was right and he should talk to Jibeom. It would be final at least. He would stop asking himself questions and move on. Donghyun was also right about the fact that honeysuckle was based on friendship and that, he did not risk losing it.

Donghyun watched his friend for a while. He didn’t know if he should be amused or depressed. Frustrated might be more accurate. He had almost hoped that he would go and check if Jibeom really had gloxinias. But no... obviously, he preferred to remain in denial. All he had to do was try another approach. Like, handcuff them for 24 hours. That would be quick. Not a bad idea.

_ Whatever you’re thinking, forget it.  
_ Hyung?  
_ I know you want to help them, but they both have to fix this themselves. If they have to start something, it’s better if they do it together.  
_ They’re not going to do anything hyung. Joochan has had his honeysuckle for months and Jibeom…  
_ I know, sighed Sungyoon.

Now that he knew Jibeom’s feelings, Donghyun really wanted to do something! He had watched his best friend as he struggled with his flowers without being able to do anything. He wanted to help him now that he could!  
_ How can he sleep?  
_ It was a tiring day. He hadn’t been on stage in a while.  
_ He was full of energy earlier. Jibeomie’s also sleeping.  
_ Jibeomie has been tired for weeks.

*********************************** *********************************** *************************

Jibeom awoke the next day with the faint hope that Donghyun would have keep his tongue. Of course, the whole group knew. He tried to ignore it, but it was a waste of time.  
Jaehyun sat next to him on the plane and spent the flight questioning him. He would have undressed him on the spot to see those damn flowers if he could.  
Donghyun had finally saved him. And apologize. Of course he had not imagined that things would turn out this way, but the result was there: the other members all wanted to see the famous gloxinias.

_ And if… I know you don’t like them very much, but if you show them, they’ll leave you alone.  
_ I don’t want to show them Donghyun. It’s personal!  
_ I understand, but…  
_ You don’t understand, you don’t have flowers.  
_ …  
_ Sorry.  
_ You…  
_ No, really. I wasn’t allowed to say that. I’m nervous.  
_ Excuse accepted. And I’m sorry too. I just wanted to help you, but I did it like a dummy.  
_ That’s for sure.  
_ You shouldn’t have to hide them. You look like you’re ashamed of them.  
_ I am not ashamed of them, Jibeom said.  
_ They’re beautiful. Frankly. And J…, the person they’re there for is very fortunate.  
_ You didn’t tell him.  
_ No. I’m not allowed to.

Sungyoon insisted on this point.

_ You had no right to tell them about my gloxinias, either.  
_ I…  
_ That’s okay. They would have seen them eventually. They keep expanding.  
_ Because they want to be seen.  
_ Maybe. I just want them to disappear.  
_ If you really did, they wouldn’t be here.  
_ I…  
_ Gloxinias are not nothing, Jibeom. You’re lucky.  
_ You’ve never had flowers, Dongdong-ah?  
_ Never. Aren’t these your first?  
_ Actually yes.  
_ Can I?

He was dying to touch them. What texture could it have?

_ No, Jibeom went backwards.  
_ They are so beautiful.  
_ Idiot.  
_ Hehe. All kidding aside, show them once and they’ll stop harassing you.

Jibeom sighed. Donghyun was not entirely wrong. But he could always hope that his teammates would get tired. Of course, just as his flowers never wanted to wither, it didn’t go exactly as he wanted. Ignoring the problem was clearly not the best solution.  
He had lasted 3 whole weeks. 3 very long weeks. Before cracking.  
They had come back from a shoot and had driven 3 hours which seemed to last the double. He was at his end. He was patient, but even he had his limits.

_ Okay. You’re done? Because it’s getting painful. You want to see these damn gloxinias, right? Because what I want doesn’t matter, does it?! And why don’t we all get naked while we’re at it? You never know, maybe one of you is hiding flowers too, huh?  
_ Jibeom-ah…

Why did they all look so shocked? How do they thought he would react to their constant harassment?

_ Oh! Come on! It’s a party! Hyung! You don’t get flowers on your buttocks, hmm?  
_ What? Of course not!  
_ So what? I’m the only one who has to undress to satisfy your misplaced curiosity?  
_ It seems so?

Bad move for Jangjun. Jibeom was not one to hold grudge or been vindictive, but they had pushed him to the limit and the rapper took a mean dark look like a punch.

_ We just want to see what they look like Jibeomie, added Seungmin.  
_ And then you’ll want to know who they are for, right?  
_ Well…  
_ He’s right, said Joochan. It’s a personal thing.  
_ We are a group, we should not hide this kind of thing, said Jaehyun.  
_ Oh! You just want to know who is the competition Jaehyun.  
_ That is not true!  
_ I just want to see the flowers, said Bomin. Jaehyun’s flowers are pretty, but it seems that the gloxinias are special.  
_ They’re just flowers, Jibeom mumbled.  
_ Please hyung! insisted Bomin in full aegyo mode.

But why were they all against him? He bit his lower lip, trying not to grieve miserably with frustration.  
Sungyoon glanced a little panicked at their leader, but Daeyeol didn’t seem to want to stop the inquisition. It couldn’t end well. He also wanted to see the famous gloxinias, but Jibeom was at the end of his nerve and they could not force him without permanently damaging their group.

_ We should calm down already. Jibeomie doesn’t have to…  
_ But!  
_ No 'but'. We’re sorry Jibeomie, I understand it’s too much for you.  
_ I just don’t understand why you insist so much?  
_ Jibeomie, said Daeyeol gently as if not to scare him, we do not want to be cruel, but we have already seen someone in your case with Jangjun.  
_ These were not gloxinias, but flowers with a strong meaning, Jangjun said.  
_ It was one of our hyungs when we had just entered as trainee in Woollim.  
_ He fell in love with one of our other hyungs and hid it. His flowers were well hidden at the bottom of his back, but not as sheltered as he hoped.  
_ No one understood what was going on until it was too late, but he…  
_ He killed himself, finished Daeyeol. Because these flowers that he absolutely wanted to hide reacted every time he interacted in some way with the… The person that those damn flowers were made for.  
_ This was an extreme case hyung, Sungyoon pointed out.

And it wasn’t quite the same situation. The fact that the flowers were on his back clearly showed that he was ashamed of them, so that he was ashamed of what he felt. Jibeom was not ashamed of them. His flowers were in front and in theory Joochan would not push him away. He barely remembered the hyung in question, but Daeyeol and Jangjun had shared their room with him.

_ That was extreme, yes. But it happened because he didn’t speak before.  
_ When ignored, flowers can become difficult to bear. Especially those with high significance.  
_ They will eventually wither, Jibeom murmured.  
_ No Jibeom, told him softly but firmly Daeyeol, they will not disappear.  
_ Hyung?  
_ I researched the gloxinias and once I managed to sort through all the high-pitched fairy tales, I discovered something. Gloxinias mean ‘Love at First Sight’…  
_ We already know that, Daeyeol-hyung.  
_ I’m not done yet.  
_ We’re listening, said Sungyoon.  
_ So … it means ‘Love At First’ and once it appears, most of the time, the gloxinias wilt within 7 days.  
_ So fast, huh?  
_ A ‘love at first sight’ moves on if it has no roots to anchor on.  
_ That makes sense.  
_ There was only one at the beginning, sighed Jibeom.  
_ So Jibeom’s love at first sight is anchored?  
_ 3 ½ years? It’s more than anchored, yes.  
_ Okay.  
_ I do not intend to commit suicide hyung.  
_ Because you are strong Jibeomie, but I dare you to tell me you have no reaction?  
_ I…

Jibeom inspired a great blow, sighed and began to undress. Oh, he did not approve, far from it. But he understood. And he was touched that Daeyeol had done some research. So he could give him that if it could tranquilize him.

_ Oh!  
_ Wow! Jibeom-ah!  
_ This is…  
_ … beautiful.  
_ I understand what you meant by ‘flowerbed’ Donghyun-ah.  
_ I’ve seen the whole thing!  
_ Pervert, mumbled Jibeom.  
_ This is very extensive Jibeom, Daeyeol pointed out by examining it carefully. Where did it start from?  
_ From my hip. It doesn’t hurt hyung. Actually, it’s pretty nice. They are of all colors, sometimes all open or partially in buds.  
_ They are open there.  
_ Because they are… happy?  
_ Are you serious?  
_ I’m fine. Is it okay now? Are you done admiring me?  
_ Are you sure it doesn’t hurt?  
_ Certain.  
_ Even if you get in touch with… him?  
_ It’s supposed to do something? It’s just… nice.  
_ Nice, that’s good.  
_ And if we touch? asked Jaehyun, touching a purple flower.  
_ No!!!!

Jibeom leaped back and Joochan came between them before he understood exactly why his body was moving by itself.

_ Jibeom-ah? asked Jangjun.  
_ Not…, murmured Jibeom who had suddenly whitened.  
_ Don’t touch him!!  
_ Joochan-ah, what are you…?  
_ Joo?

Joochan turned to Jibeom and touched his hip.  
_ He’s not allowed to touch.  
_ I know, the young man answered him without trying to move.

Joochan suddenly took on a crimson hue, realizing what he had just done.

_ Okay. I… ah… I…so…  
_ Maybe you have something to say Joochan? said Daeyeol. Flowers to show?  
_ Uh… actually… I just… it was not long ago?  
_ Show, sighed their leader. And if anyone has some it’s the time to show them before I decide to make a daily nudist party.  
_ Uh hyung, that may not be necessary.  
_ First Jibeom, now Joochan. You do have flowers, don’t you, Joochan?  
_ I...yes?

He took off his T-shirt, making several branches of intertwined pink honeysuckles appear from his heart to his belly. In fact, looking closely, the branch stopped where Jibeom’s gloxinias began at this place.

_ …  
_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ It’s so beautiful…  
_ These are honeysuckles.  
_ And… what do they mean?  
_ Deep Friendship.  
_ Friendship?  
_ But when they’re pink, it turns into love.  
_ They are pink.   
_ They are pink.  
_ For… me?

Joochan nodded. He felt like he was having an experience outside of his body because it all seemed unreal.

_ The gloxinias? he asked.  
_ I… saw you in the waiting room for the audition.  
_ Me? The gloxinias?  
_ It only took a second. I’m sorry! I tried to ignore it, but instead of fading, there were several. First in buds. They’re actually buds most often when… when you’re not with me. But… uh… they like the water, so they open up when I take a shower and… uh…

Oh my God, he was talking nonsense. Since when did Joochan’s eyes have green reflections?

_ Okay, that’s enough for both of you. You guys are cute, but I’m sure no one really wants to see this.  
_ Hyung?  
_ Does anyone else have flowers to show?  
_ Me?  
_ Bomin-ah?  
_ But just a little.  
_ What sort of little?  
_ They’re leaving. Because Donghyun-hyung is infernal and treats me like a kid.  
_ Okay. Donghyun-ah?  
_ No flowers at all.

Jibeom let Daeyeol have his inspection and focused on the most important, namely Joochan still facing him. Could he touch the honeysuckles? But he was a little afraid that he wouldn’t make himself get away from Joochan if he touched him. Especially considering their respective attire.

_ Since when? he finally asked him.  
_ Genie.  
_ Your wound?  
_ Before, but they were white at first. Donghyun saw them before me. It took us days to find out what it was.  
_ At least you got to talk to Donghyun about it.  
_ And Sungyoon-hyung. You didn’t tell anyone?  
_ I really thought they were going to disappear. It was manageable and all of a sudden they started to multiply and expand.  
_ Just like that?  
_ Um... actually it was right along Genie, so I guess they reacted to your honeysuckles.  
_ Oh. I didn’t know it was possible.  
_ So…  
_ So…

Donghyun shook his head negatively watching his two comrades behave like schoolgirls meeting their idol for the first time. Forget the handcuffs, he was going to lock them up in a hotel room without a TV or cell phone. They’d find a way to entertain each other certainly. Otherwise than by looking into the whites of the eyes and blushing with a little luck.

_ Don’t even think about it, said Sungyoon, with a smile on his face. Leave it to them.  
_ But they do nothing hyung! They will drive me crazy. Look at them!  
_ They’re cute. They don’t need more right now. I am sure that at some point you will be tired of seeing them all the time affectionate and one on top of the other. Enjoy the calm before the storm Dongdongie.

Donghyun grimaced. He hadn’t thought about that! What had he triggered?!! Could he go back? Above all to not discover the gloxinias of Jibeom and... But no in fact. Because he hadn’t seen his friends so happy in months, and he was foolishly smiling in reaction.


	7. Limitebreack

Limitebreack

It started in a pretty usual way. They were all exhausted except Jangjun who obviously had an unlimited energy reserve.  
Most of the time, it was a good thing, but when they were all tired as they were now, it clashed a little with the other members.  
Especially if Daeyeol and Jaeseok were not there to temper the matter.

Jangjun and Tag had started by playing a little too loudly to the taste of Jaehyun and Donghyun and it had degenerated into a chick fight.  
For the third time this week.

They had almost all tried to calm them down without any results. Until Jibeom came between them, which had pissed Jaehyun off even more and he immediately changed target.  
Jibeom certainly did not expect to hear his 4 truths coming out of the mouth of the one he considered his best friend in the group. In fact, no one expected it. The words had been brutal, cruel and contained just the part of truth needed to strike where it hurt.

Jibeom had taken 2 steps back, obviously shocked, before going to his room to get out a few moments later and leave the dormitory in the most complete silence.

_ Why hyung? murmured Bomin.  
_ I … did not mean that, said Jaehyun, eyes wide.

Joochan cast an interrogative look at Donghyun, but he seemed as lost as he was. Jangjun was pinned down and Jaehyun panicked.

_ Maybe someone should catch him?  
_ If you say so, Seungmin, go get him.  
_ He certainly went to the training room, didn’t he?  
_ Jibeomie? I don’t think he really … I mean … he had a headache, Donghyun mumbled.  
_ And he was really tired. He told me he had calf cramps earlier. I don’t think he went to practice, added Joochan.

Even after what Jaehyun had told him. Besides, it had been really low on Jaehyun’s part. He had really targeted all the points where Jibeom was not sure of himself. This showed at least that he knew their comrade well…  
The only advantage was that it calmed Jaehyun and Jangjun.

_ We will let him calm down quietly. He will return whenever he wants, said Sungyoon.  
_ He does not answer the phone, sighed Seungmin.  
_ Maybe he didn’t take it.  
_ He dismissed the call.  
_ Oh.

It wasn’t Jibeom type. In fact, Joochan had never seen him dismiss a call, even if he did not want to talk to the person in question. Jibeom tried not to do to others what he would not want them to do to him.  
They could do nothing more for the moment, so Joochan went back dragging his feet to do his homework due the next day and barely started.

_ Oh shit!  
_ Do you want help with something?  
_ Jibeomie was supposed to help me with my math!

Youngtaek made a grimace and Jaehyun hid behind a book while Bomin shrugged his shoulders. But frankly, what help could be the integrals in the future, huh?

_ Do you want to trade? I have English.  
_ No, thank you. It’s worse.  
_ Jaehyun can help you with that.  
_ No, thank you. He’s done enough for today.

Which was a bit cold, but Joochan didn’t care about it right now. Jibeom had not returned at 2am when they went to bed, nor in the morning when they left for school.  
It was weird to leave without having a special Jibeom breakfast… He almost felt sorry for Jaehyun, who of course blamed himself and who didn’t seem to have slept all night.

Unfortunately, there was nothing to do. Jibeom had not responded to their leader either and since it was theoretically a day of rest, their manager had told them to leave him alone.  
Joochan knew that other members of the group had tried to reach him unsuccessfully so when his phone rang at lunch time, he did not expect to hear Jibeom.

_ Joochan-ah? Are you alone?  
_ I’m waiting for the others for lunch. Where are you, Jibeomie?

From time to time they would meet with each other and have lunch together rather than with their classmates when they had things to discuss about the group.

_ I needed to think, sighed his friend at the other end of the line.  
_ Jaehyun did not mean what he said. He was just…  
_ I know, cut Jibeom. I am at the sea, he added a moment later.  
_ At the sea? he repeated.  
_ I couldn’t go to Busan, so I just took the bus and… I’m not sure where I am actually.  
_ That’s all you… No one recognized you?  
_ I don’t think so.  
_ Are you feeling better?  
_ … Actually, I feel a little lonely. It’s stupid, isn’t it?  
_ We’ve all been together for what… 2 years? I think it’s normal that it feels weird to be alone all of a sudden.  
_ But being by the sea is really refreshing. You’ll have to come with me next time.  
_ Why don’t you come home now? We have a lot of things planned for tomorrow.  
_ … I know. I sent my location to a manager, he’s going to pick me up.  
_ Don’t you want to?  
_ Yes. No. I don’t know.

He beckoned to Bomin, who had just joined him, to remain silent.

_ Someone just arrived, hmm?  
_ What…?  
_ I’ll let you eat.  
_ Will you be here when we get back to the dorms?  
_ Yes. I will call Daeyeol-hyung and listen wisely to my sermon.  
_ You spent the night on the beach?  
_ Yes.  
_ I didn’t know you missed it.  
_ Um. Go eat now. And good luck with the rest of your classes.  
_ Ok. I… Send a message to Donghyun too.  
_ If it makes you happy. See you later, Joochanie.

Joochan looked at his cell phone for a moment, smiling. It felt like a weight was off.

_ It was Jibeom-hyung? asked Bomin.  
_ Yes, he… he’s fine.  
_ Did he came back home? asked Youngtaek  
_ He’s somewhere by the sea.  
_ At the sea?  
_ Is… he going home? asked Jaehyun.  
_ Not thanks to you, but yeah.  
_ Joochan-ah, don’t add to it.

He preferred to remain quiet and eat in silence. And then, he had math after that…  
The atmosphere was relaxed when they arrived at the dormitories, but there was no Jibeom in sight.

_ He’s sleeping, Jaeseok told them with a smile.  
_ The idiot pull an all-nighter, sighed Daeyeol.  
_ According to him, the stars by the sea are too beautiful to be deprived of them while sleeping, explained Sungyoon laughing.  
_ Don’t go, Joochan. He needs to sleep.  
_ I’m not gonna wake him up.  
_ Jangjun’s with him, don’t bother them.  
_ Jangjun is calm for once…  
_ Can we go change?  
_ They’re in the other room.

That didn’t stop Joochan from going to take a look. Why could Jangjun sleep with Jibeom hu? And he wasn’t even asleep, his eyes were open.

_ Joochanie, do you want my place? asked the rapper with a smirk.  
_ Hyung said to leave you alone.  
_ I think Jibeomie would prefer you to be his stuffed animal.

He approached, a little hesitant.

_ I don’t want to wake him up.  
_ Come here before I change my mind.

Jibeom smelled like the ocean. He didn’t bathe in the sea, did he? The smell was nice. It was relaxing after his day. He was cozy there, like in a cocoon with Jibeom.

_ Did he really call you?  
_ Um?

Ah, Jangjun was still there. What did he ask?

_ What…? Ah. Yes, at noon.  
_ Why though?  
_ Why?

It wasn’t really the time for philosophical questions… And something told him that’s exactly why his hyung was questioning him.

_ I understand he called Daeyeol-hyung, but...you?  
_ Ah. I don’t know. Maybe he wanted to reassure us without calling Jaehyun.  
_ Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t think it was a coincidence that he called you, but that’s just my opinion.  
_ I don’t know what you’re getting at, hyung?

His brain was in pause mode there. Math class had ended him and he was too well installed to not feel lethargic. Why didn’t Jangjun let him sleep? He was going to wake up Jibeom.

_ Just that Jibeom may be more attached to you than to the other members.  
_ … Even if he was, and I’m not saying he is, I don’t see the problem.

Jangjun had a logic that sometimes escaped him. Really, where did he get that?

_ Don’t give him false hope.

And what exactly did that mean? False hopes? Did Jibeom expect anything from him? Because he had given up that hope himself a long time ago. Jangjun wouldn’t joke about that kind of thing, would he?  
Jibeom curled up against him and he preferred to concentrate on him rather than overheating his poor brain. He’d test that crazy theory later.  
Maybe.  
At the moment he was going to sleep.

Joochan woke up the next morning, well rested and undoubtedly alone. He feared for a moment that he had dreamed of the return of his comrade and rose up hastily, looking for Jibeom in every room.

_ He is in the bathroom, said Daeyeol, looking blasé even as the day had just begun.  
_ Ah!

He immediately went to the said bathroom. He had to check, didn’t he? Just to be sure.

_ You know he won’t let you in? said Daeyeol, shaking his head negatively.  
_ Why wouldn’t he?  
_ It’s Jibeom, not Jangjun or Bomin.

From his point of view, it was easier to deal with Jibeom, but he wasn’t going to discuss that with Daeyeol. It was still early and the others were asleep for the moment, but it wasn’t going to last. And he didn’t want to think about Jangjun at the moment, or what he had said the day before. Besides, he didn’t think about it. At all. He just wanted to see Jibeom.

_ Jibeom-ah! Let me in, I need the shower!  
_ Joochanie? Already up?  
_ I just got up. Someone let me all alone and the bed was cold.  
_ Ah.

The door lock clicked and Joochan smiled satisfied to Daeyeol before entering the room.

_ This is totally unfair! cried Daeyeol. I’ll remember that Jibeom-ah!  
_ What’s he talking about?  
_ He was convinced you wouldn’t let me in.  
_ Why not?  
_ Nice mask.  
_ Blue suits me well, eh? he said with a smirk.  
_ Let’s say that. At least you don’t have any stripes.  
_ It can be arranged, he said, laughing.  
_ I’m passing. You seem to be feeling better.

He shrugged and sighed.

_ Sorry. I shouldn’t have left like that, but I had reached my limits. I had to get some air before I said something stupid I would have regretted.  
_ Um. Jaehyun has…  
_ I don’t want to talk about it, Joo.  
_ But…  
_ Please. I know my flaws, and I try to improve, but…  
_ We all have flaws. And that’s what makes us complete each over. Life would be boring if we were all perfect, said Joochan.

Jibeom nodded with a smile. These were things he was aware of, but it was always good to hear aloud.

_ Weren’t you supposed to take a shower?  
_ Are you coming with me? Your hair will really turn blue if you don’t rinse. Or worse, pink.  
_ The pink would suit me well! I would match with Seungmin!  
_ Hey! It is with me that you must be matched! We are the 3355!

Which stunned him just enough time for Joochan to push him in the shower with him. He immediately regretted his decision, because really, who wanted to find himself in this situation with a person whom he was not sure of his feelings towards him? He would have preferred that Jangjun did not say anything in the end. Really! This hyung spoke too much!

_ You’re blushing Joo, pointed out Jibeom  
_ The water is hot!  
_ Barely.  
_ I’m glad you’re home.  
_ Um.  
_ We were worried.  
_ I know. Jangjun-hyung turned into koala mode as soon as I arrived yesterday.  
_ Oh.  
_ And I could have sworn I fell asleep with him.  
_ Oh.

Oh oh. He had to get out of there. Really, it was a very bad idea. He was clean and reassured about the presence of his friend, he just had to get out of there. Quickly. Before he does or say something embarrassing.

_ Help me rinse this thing, asked Jibeom.   
_ Uh…  
_ Are they less dry? The lightening dries them so much, I’ve never had so much trouble with my hair before.  
_ They are soft…

Very soft. And whatever that mask was, it smelled very good.

_ It is based on pomegranate, Jibeom answered his mute question.

Or maybe he said it out loud? Because he was just panicking. He had seen Jibeom naked hundreds of times, there was no reason to panic! He blamed Jangjun for it! Why did he give him such ideas? Hope was something dangerous, especially when it was a matter of the heart.

_ Done.  
_ You’re still red, you know?

His friend went out and wrapped himself in a large towel, giving him one on the way. He felt less exposed like that, but Jibeom didn’t seem to be done with him.

_ I have a question.  
_ Yes?  
_ I fell asleep with Jangjun-hyung in koala mode begging me to forgive him and I woke up in your arms. In a rather intimate position… actually. You’ve never done this before.

Intimate? Intimate? What did he do in his sleep?

_ And you talk in your sleep, said Jibeom with a little pout.  
_ … Did I say something?  
_ It wasn’t very cohesive. I think you even sang at one point.  
_ Sorry.  
_ It wasn’t unpleasant. I wasn’t sure what it meant and if I had to tell you about it, but… you keep blushing and you…  
_ Sorry! It’s because of Jangjun-hyung!

Jibeom raised an eyebrow, seeming to say that he was clearly unreasonable and that Jangjun was not with them. This was not exactly false…

_ The question is: Why?  
_ Why?  
_ I’ve never seen you blush like that before. That’s adorable, but I don’t understand what I did to cause it.  
_ You… didn’t do anything special. You’re just you.  
_ So… you were just worried? Nothing more?

He was going to end up creating a self-combustion phenomenon. Why was Jibeom looking at him like that? He was going to end up doing something stupid if he kept going. Like... he could kiss him. It was very tempting. His lips were moving, but he didn’t understand what he was saying.

_ Joochan-ah?  
_ …  
_ Joochanie? Are you feeling okay?

Jibeom put his hand on his forehead. Was the water that hot? He wasn’t going to pass out, was he? He just wanted to know if there was a possibility of something more than friendship with the main vocal, not making him catatonic.  
He’d been thinking nonstop about it since he woke up in his arms, squeezed like he was afraid he’d run away. In fact, so close that he could only feel the attraction of his friend who had chosen this moment to whisper his name.

_ Can I kiss you? asked Joochan finally.

Well… he didn’t expect that question. He just wanted an answer, but… yes, he assumed it answered it. And maybe Joochan would pick up a more or less normal shade after that.

_ Jibeom-ah! Joochan-ah! Are you almost done with the bathroom?!  
_ You’ve been in there for almost an hour! You’re not alone!!

They looked at each other and could only laugh. Of course, they were not alone. It was expected of their teammates to come and interrupt their first kiss.

_ Perhaps on our next day of rest we can go to the sea together, suggested Jibeom.  
_ It’s in a long time! protested Joochan. Invite me to eat ice cream!  
_ Really?  
_ And in the movies.  
_ You want a date basically.  
_ Um. But first another kiss before leaving the bathroom to them.

Jibeom did it without protesting. He could do it all day if he wanted it. And if their teammates stopped knocking on the door as if there was fire in the dormitories…


	8. Bubble part01

Bubble part01

Jibeom turned off his alarm clock and watched the luminous digital numbers without moving.  
He didn’t want to get up.  
Not that this state of affairs was unusual, but the more time passed, the worse it was.

It wasn’t the classes that bothered him, or even the schedules or the teachers… no, his problem was the students. All the other students. It was a chore to be surrounded by so many people while feeling completely invisible.

He had initially tried to talk to his comrades, he had tried to fit. To no avail. He did not like being in large groups. He just had the impression that he was trying to adjust to people who, in the end, did not really interest him and who obviously did not care about him in the least.  
The others were not really mean or aggressive. No, simply, they hardly spoke to him and even when he tried to enter into a conversation, he was ignored.  
It was a pain in the ass.

Of course, he didn’t go to school to make friends, but still… it would have been much more tolerable if he had someone to talk to.  
At the moment, going to school was just a huge chore that he couldn’t escape. And it has only been three short weeks since it started.

He just wanted to bury himself under his quilt and not move. But even doing that… it didn’t stop him from asking himself questions.  
What could he have done or said to find himself in this situation?

He had talked about it with his brother, to check that it was not just him who was terribly boring and uninteresting, but he had laughed. He then spent a good hour explaining to him that he was completely normal and that he was not the problem. For him, he simply had nothing in common with his classmates.

His brother was fantastic and he adored him. He was very grateful to him. Unfortunately, that did not change anything about his situation.

As usual, he arrived 10 minutes before the bell. He entered the room for 2 hours of math and settled into an empty double office. The place next to him remained empty until the last minute when the last student entered and had no choice but to sit in the last available place.

It wasn’t a big deal. He just had to ignore it and take the course. He liked math. Math was good. The numbers were reassuring and simple.

At noon, he decided not to join the others to eat. It was useless anyway and it made him have a bad time. When he thought about it, he preferred to eat alone. He looked for an open room, empty and far from the frequented areas.  
He had to admit that it was much more enjoyable. He felt more relaxed going back to class for the afternoon. Always a little lonely, but it seemed to be less important. He had his music, good books and didn’t really need more.  
Or at least he was going to convince himself! His brother had advised him to join a club, but he had to admit that he did not particularly want to submit to the same kind of behavior in a club.

A few weeks later, he was convinced that he had found the right solution. Of course, he always felt alone and knew that his charming comrades were breaking sugar on his back, sometimes not even discreetly, but his anxiety ball had disappeared and it was no longer so painful to get up in the morning and go to school.

It was perfectly tolerable from his point of view. Not ideal, but tolerable.  
It was perfectly conceivable for him to spend the rest of the year, and the following if necessary, in this way. For the moment he had to finish his 3 years of high school, take his exam and consider going to university or something leading him to a not too unpleasant job.

If he had any luck on the way, he would meet 1 or 2 people who would be more like him than like them and he would no longer be so alone.  
Maybe.  
It was not an obligation.

*****  
Jibeom dragged himself yawning towards his breakfast room. He was coming out of an hour of History and it could have this kind of sleepy effect on him. He had to admit that it was not his favorite subject.  
He sat silently, took out his lunch box and went to put on his headphones when he realized that there was already music. It was a slow piano melody, pleasant to listen to and which lasted several minutes before being joined by a voice.  
An unmistakably masculine and absolutely magnificent voice. Undoubtedly the most beautiful voice he has ever heard.

On the following days, his new neighbour returned. Sometimes he only played the piano, sometimes he sang too, and once he even played the violin. Jibeom didn’t knew he liked to listen to the violin before that day.

He had never met the person in question. Or them? Maybe there were several? One and the same person could not have so much talent! He had to admit to being a little intrigued. Not enough to go and see, even when the guitar was added to the other instruments, but intrigued nonetheless.  
It made him think of something other than his classes and the latest video game releases.  
He had become so accustomed to his musical interlude at noon that when it interrupted himself suddenly for several days, he could not help but be disappointed.  
All the more so when this state of affairs extended to the whole week.  
And so… he was tempted to go and see what was going on in the next room.

He glanced in the classroom before going to eat and was not surprised when he discovered that it was a music room. There was no one, but there was a piano and on the side several storage containers of instruments.

_ Are you coming in?

He startled and turned to find himself face to face with a blond boy of the same size and who immediately made him think of a fennec. He smiled and his eyes sparkled with curiosity.

_ I… Sorry. I’m going next door.  
_ Oh? There’s a club meeting? I thought it was empty! I’ll avoid to play then.  
_ No, no! I’m just eating there!

What did he do? That’s why he shouldn’t talk to people! He didn’t want the music to stop! It was one of the only good things of his day!

_ There? asked the boy, raising his eyebrows.  
_ It’s quiet. And the music is pretty nice.  
_ But all alone? You…  
_ Joochan-ah, you’re embarrassing him. What did I tell you about letting people do what they want?  
_ But Donghyun-ah! immediately protested the blond.  
_ Tss tss. Sorry about that. Joochan has Savior Syndrome but I’m handling it, no worries. You can run away.

Jibeom bowed slightly to the newcomer and did exactly what he had suggested. They seemed nice, but if it was so that they would not speak to him next week, it was not worth it. He would just listen to the music during his lunch break. That was fine with him.   
The melody on the violin had been very joyful that afternoon. He wondered which of the 2 boys was playing it.

The next day, he had just settled down when Joochan passed his head through the door of the room. He had barely had time to greet him before he was taken by Donghyun. And he had sung that day. It was Joochan who sang, Jibeom was almost sure of it. He looked hyperactive, but Jibeom had to admit that he loved his voice.  
He had tried to record it, but the quality of his phone was really bad. Unfortunately.

Jibeom himself loved to sing. His family always made him sing at their family reunions, but his voice was for ballads. Or just for fun. When he had friends before the move, he enjoyed going to karaoke with them. Joochan seemed to be able to sing anything.

Of course, Joochan did not intend to leave it at that. He had discovered his name, he did not know exactly how, and seemed to take pleasure in greeting him whenever he saw him. Jibeom did not know exactly what he wanted from him and thanked God for Donghyun who always came to pick up his friend quickly.

If nothing else, it broke his routine a bit. Whether it was a good thing or not remained to be determined. He had grown accustomed to loneliness and was not ready to give it up.  
He felt safe in his solitude.  
He was fine with it.

So… if someone could explain to him why Joochan was sitting in front of him smiling in his breakfast room?

_ Jibeom-ah! How was your morning? I had chemistry for 2 hours! We managed to blow up the experiment. I thought the teacher was going to kill us!  
_ Joochan… Where is Donghyun?  
_ His dance club organizes a performance so he has to rehearse even at lunch. I did try to snatch Jaehyun from his drawing club, but he made resistance. However, lunch is for eating! They can go to their clubs after school! That’s what I do! Do you go to a Jibeom-ah club?  
_ No.  
_ Why don’t you?  
_ Because.

Did he ever stop speaking? Although... to tell the truth, his voice was pleasant and he had a very expressive way of expressing himself. No wonder he sang so well, he seemed to have no trouble expressing his feelings.

_ I’m in the choir! Well, it’s more of a little singing club, I guess. We’re having fun, but I wouldn’t sacrifice my lunch to go.  
_ You sing at noon, could not help but point out Jibeom.  
_ Hehe. Did you hear me? I love to sing and the music room is deserted at lunch anyway. No one bothers.  
_ You… also play the violin.  
_ Yep! I’ve even been in an orchestra! But Donghyun says it breaks his ears.  
_ You’re not in the orchestra anymore?

He played so well. They were crazy if they had fired him.

_ No. The atmosphere in this kind of thing is horrible. It almost made me hate music. Good riddance frankly. Do you like music? Hey! You could come to the choir because you don’t have a club!  
_ No.  
_ Buuuuuuut! Why not? You could at least try!  
_ No.

It was out of the question. Joochan sighed and tidied up his lunch box.

_ We are not enough so it is a little limited. Sometimes I can take Donghyun and Jaehyun, but they have their own clubs.  
_ How many of you are there?  
_ Four.  
_ Oh.

Well, it wasn’t much.  
_ Six if we count Donghyun and Jaehyun as honorary members. So, since you don’t do anything you could come.

Joochan had dangerous eyes… a dangerous voice as well. That voice… He couldn’t accept it. He knew it. It could only end in heartbreak for him and he had already suffered enough this year.

_ Who says I can sing?  
_ Everyone can sing! Joochan said with a disarming smile.

He shrugged his shoulders. There was no need for him to try to explain to Joochan that he did not want to be in the presence of additional people who could separate him, make him feel abnormal and hurt him. He had finally managed to reach a stable situation, he wanted to stay like that. Even though Joochan had invited himself into his bubble and made him eyes of beaten dog.

_ Please? Just to see! Just once!  
_ I…

He hesitated. Fatal error. Joochan had immediately plunged into the rift and he had no choice but to agree to accompany him to his club. Besides, to make sure he didn’t run away, Joochan came to pick him up after his last class. He must have known someone in his class.  
Donghyun was with him and looked very tired. Jibeom wasn’t sure it was because of the dance…

_ Jibeom-ah! Donghyunie has agreed to accompany us!  
_ Joochan, what did we say?  
_ But I’m not harassing him here.  
_ Joochan, sigh Donghyun.  
_ What’s Jaehyun doing? He didn’t fall asleep, did he?

Why did he ask him? He had no idea who Jaehyun was. Joochan entered the class and came out a moment later with a boy with coppery hair, a little curly, clearly just awake. Geography was not necessarily the most interesting subject for their section.

At least it solved the mystery of how Joochan got his information.  
The blond led them to the music room, babbling enthusiastically.

_ I’m sorry Jibeom, blew Donghyun who was walking next to him leaving Jaehyun to keep their friend busy. He gets excited when it comes to music. You don’t have to come.  
_ It’s nothing. He’ll leave me alone once he sees that I’m not interested.  
_ I wouldn’t bet on that…

What do you mean he wouldn’t bet on it? He wasn’t going to endure it regularly! He would never survive Joochan’s techniques!

The room was not empty. There were 3 boys looking at something on a phone.  
The first was their size, dark-blue hair and made them a welcome smile. The second much smaller had pink hair and Jibeom remembered seeing him more than once in the corridors. The third one was tall and thin, he exuded an aura of authority that his smile immediately destroyed. He must have been used to taking care of younger children.

_ Ah! Joochan-ah! You brought your friends, I see. It’s good, we wanted to start an EXO song.  
_ Oh! Which one? Show hyung!!

Joochan immediately leaped towards them, leaving them at the entrance.

_ EXO?  
_ The club is called ‘choir’, but in fact, they just sing what they want, Donghyun said. Sometimes they do mixes with the girls' club, but they are focused on american songs that go way too high in high pitches.  
_ Oh. There’s no teacher?  
_ Yes. He comes later. He runs both clubs, so he starts with the girls and comes after.  
_ Not very practical.

Donghyun shrugged.

_ It’s just for fun. The hyungs want to study music, it’s good to say that they are in a music club even if they rarely do competitions. I think they won something last year.  
_ But it’s supposed to be a choir.  
_ You’re not going to stay anyway.

Donghyun was not wrong, but he still found it a bit disturbing. You could study beautiful songs with a choir. He did it when he was younger. And, of course, EXO had some really nice songs, but most of them had a bit of rap, which wasn’t really suitable for a choir.

_ Jibeom-ah! Come! I’ll introduce you to the hyungs!  
_ Joochan-ah, did you find us a new member?!  
_ Jibeom-ah, meet Lee Daeyeol and Choi Sungyoon who are in terminal and Bae Seungmin who is in 1st.  
_ Hyungs, this is Kim Jibeom. He’s in Jaehyun’s class.  
_ Another Googoo.  
_ Since when do you sing Jibeom?  
_ Who said I knew how to sing? Joochan just brought me here because I don’t have a club.  
_ Hong Joochan, what did we say about this?  
_ Jaehyun said he can sing, protested the blond.  
_ Jaehyun-ah?  
_ Um? Singing? Who?  
_ Jibeom.  
_ Oh yes! Yes, yes, he sings. I saw a video. A song by Paul Kim, I don’t know which one. I think it was one of his cousins filming.

Jibeom frowned. It didn’t surprise him that one of his damn cousins posted a video of him singing. He had to admit that their little band was doing well. And, okay, he just loved Joochan’s voice.  
However, just because he knew how to sing and loved to sing didn’t necessarily mean he wanted to join their club. Yes, even if a small voice in his head blew that it would certainly be fantastic to sing with Joochan, to see what could give their 2 mixed voices.  
He wanted to stay in his bubble and be safe, all alone. It wasn’t that complicated. It had worked very well since the beginning of the year, why couldn’t it continue?  
He understood the following days because Joochan seemed determined not to leave him in peace. He was going to find out which one of his cousins had put that damn video online and she was going to suffer. For a long time.  
And why did Joochan decide to come and eat with him? Okay, Donghyun was busy with his dance club, but Joochan was popular, so he couldn’t have run out of people to eat with.  
Not that his company was unpleasant.

In addition to Joochan, Jaehyun had become accustomed to sitting next to him. Well, most of the time he was daydreaming, so Jibeom had to admit he wasn’t bothering him. He just didn’t really understand why he was doing this…

Of course, it couldn’t stop there. After a few weeks, Jaehyun started talking to him in class. First, they were just clarifying what they were studying, and then other things that had absolutely nothing to do with school life.  
Donghyun was no longer taken by his club for lunch and came to eat with Joochan and him. They now ate at 3 and not always in the room he had assigned himself because Joochan liked to use the instruments of the music room when he had finished his meal.

Nice way to be alone, really.

He loved Joochan for it. He and his stupid, beautiful voice to which he could obviously refuse nothing.  
Joochan regularly came to pick him up after his last class and he attended their rehearsal. He just listened, and that was good enough. It was getting him out of his bubble too much from his point of view. And he loved their company. It scared him to death. What would he do when he was alone and invisible again?  
Only… he couldn’t resist the urge to hear Joochan sing. Did Joochan realize the power he had over him? Certainly not. He would have blackmailed him already if he knew.

So that was his new routine. He no longer felt so alone but fearfully waited for the other side of the coin.  
Joochan was very popular in high school. He would realize sooner or later that Jibeom did not deserve as much of his attention. That he didn’t deserve his attention at all. And then? He would be even more alone.

_ Ji-beo-mie-ah! What are you thinking about? It doesn’t sound very cheerful.  
_ Um. No Donghyun today?  
_ Nop. We’re face to face! And I brought the dessert. I did it with my sister yesterday. Look at this!

Jibeom blinked and could not hold back a smile. Joochan had bothered to prepare something for him? Or did he just want to share what he had done for himself? It was more likely. Of course. Why would he cook just for himself?  
_ Is that okay? asked the blond.  
_ Yes, thank you.  
_ Hehe. I’m glad you like it. I had to start over 3 times before I could succeed! Who would have thought it was so complicated to do? Luckily my sister was there, I would never have made it without her.  
_ Do you often cook together?  
_ No. I don’t cook, I prefer to eat.  
_ Oh? I must feel honored then?  
_ Yes, you should!  
_ It was delicious, but… why did you go to so much trouble?  
_ It’s a bribe.  
_ A bribe?

Why would he need something like that? If he wanted something, all he had to do was ask.

_ I watched the video of you singing.  
_ Ah.  
_ You have a nice voice. A very nice voice.  
_ Thank you.  
_ And you don’t seem to have a problem singing in front of your whole family. Jaehyun said that you never talk in class and that you are reserved and shy. It doesn’t seem to be the case in reality.

Jibeom shrugged. He did not want to explain himself.

_ You seem to like singing, added Joochan.  
_ Um.  
_ You might consider singing with us.  
_ I do not…  
_ Think about it. You don’t have to, but I’d like to sing with you.

And what could he say after that? Joochan wanted to sing with him? Really? Or was it just to join the club?

_ I…  
_ Just think about it.  
_ Why? he finally asked him.

He couldn’t understand Joochan. Did he thought he was a stray little animal that he had to take care of until he got better? Or… Did he really want to be his friend? Was that possible?

_ Why what?  
_ Why do you insist?  
_ I find you interesting, said the blond as if it was going without saying.

And wasn’t that surprising? Wasn’t that the problem with his charming classmates originally? Could he say that he had something in common with Joochan? Really? Apart from his obsession with his voice.

He had done everything to keep him away, or he had tried anyway. How could it make him interesting for Joochan? It had been more than 2 months, so… Jibeom had to admit that Joochan’s interest in himself always made him so perplexed.

He abandoned the discussion on this subject and began to finish eating while Joochan settled down at the piano. It’s been a while since he played, he preferred to play the violin lately. The only problem with the violin, in Jibeom’s opinion, was that he did not sing.

Joochan did not speak to him again about his request in the following days. He was never out of conversation and continued to pick him up on the days when the club met, that is, Tuesdays and Thursdays, as well as most lunches.  
Donghyun had obviously given up preventing him from picking him through the school, and Jaehyun had never bothered him. Jibeom had the distinct impression that it made him laugh more than anything else.

That Thursday, when he left his geography class, Jaehyun yawning at his side, he was surprised to find no one.  
Bad surprise?  
He had never really protested when Joochan came to get him… had the blond finally had enough? Did he let him get used to him and give him up at the first opportunity? Perhaps he had found someone more interesting than himself to keep him company…

_ See you tomorrow, Jibeom-ah.  
_ Jaehyun… Joochan is not…  
_ Hmm? Oh. Maybe he’s late. Just go to the room directly.

On this, the redhead leaves for his own club, leaving Jibeom on the spot.  
What was he supposed to do? He wasn’t part of the singing club, he couldn’t go without Joochan.  
So… was he going home?  
Undecided, he slowly moved towards the music room. Perhaps the club meeting had been postponed?

_ Hey! Jibeom!  
_ Sungyoon-hyung, Joochan…  
_ Joochanie was kidnapped by the girls in his class for the nail club art, told him his eldest.  
_ For the what?  
_ Nails art. You know the thing where girls paint their nails and do a lot of stuff on them.  
_ Oh…  
_ And yes. That’s all Joochan. I think he lost a bet or something.  
_ Oh… okay. So I’m going to…  
_ It’s a good thing you’re here, so come and sing with us, continued Sungyoon as if he hadn’t noticed that the young man was about to go away.  
_ What…? But hyung, I…  
_ I have the perfect song for you, continued Sungyoon. I’ve been practicing playing it on the piano.  
_ But Seungmin-hyung and Daeyeol-hyung…  
_ Seungmin has a sore throat and Daeyeol’s voice is not very suitable for this kind of song.  
_ But you…  
_ Great! Here are the lyrics.

Oh. They looked way too proud of the three of them. What kind of trap had he fallen into? He should never have come without Joochan. What need did he have to come and check if the blond was there? He had seen him at lunch and knew that he was fine.

But the song was beautiful. Really beautiful. He had never heard it before and they didn’t have audio to do the original, so Sungyoon had to guide him to get what he wanted.

It was exciting. Discovering a new song was always exciting.

Sungyoon-hyung played the piano rather well and had a pleasant voice. He absolutely did not need him to sing the song in question. And these three hyungs seemed decidedly too satisfied with themselves. Nevertheless, he could not deny that he had had a very good time with them.

He hesitated to go to eat the next day. Would Joochan be there? They were on holiday at the end of the day. Was he going to go to the nail art club again? No… Joochan was holding on to his lunch, wasn’t he?

_ Jibeom-ah!!

Ah well. He was worried for nothing.

_ How could you do this to me?!! The only time I’m not here!!

Jibeom felt his eyes widening. Joochan didn’t seem very happy. Not furious as his words might have indicated, but he had a little pout… a little too adorable, to tell the truth.

_ What did I do? asked Jibeom.  
_ You sang hyung’s song!! And I was being tortured by a dozen of wild girls during that time! Besides, I couldn’t even tell you I wasn’t coming because I don’t have your phone number!  
_ I…  
_ Give me your phone.

He handed it to him without thinking, watching him enter his number and call to retrieve his own number. Was it strange to be fascinated by the discovery of a new aspect of Joochan’s voice in these particular circumstances? The blond was so expressive.

_ There you go. And now I want to hear you sing.  
_ It is time to eat, he pointed out.  
_ Jibeom-ah… you sang with the hyungs! You sang with them and not with me!

Was he really angry? He had asked him to come to the club to sing with them. Why was he sulking now?

_ I shouldn’t have?  
_ Yes. But with me!  
_ There is no club today…

This only accentuated the pout of the blond.


	9. Bubble part02

Bubble part02

Joochan sighed for what was to be the 15th time in 5 minutes, catching a dark look from Donghyun sitting on his bed next to him.

_ We’re supposed to do this presentation, Joo. You don’t have to look at your phone every 10 seconds, it won’t make him answer you faster.  
_ I know, replied the blond. But he does not answer.  
_ How many times have I told you not to harass him?  
_ I only sent him 2 messages! protested the blond, spreading all over his bed.  
_ So give him time to answer. He’s certainly busy.  
_ I just wanted to hear him.  
_ You’ll hear him when school starts again. 2 weeks, it’s not that long, you should be able to survive.  
_ Nooooooooooon, whined the blond.  
_ You’re obsessed. I don’t even understand how you haven’t already driven him away.  
_ Hey!  
_ Don’t worry, if he haven’t already run him off, he’s probably used to having you on his back all the time.  
_ Buuuuuuuuut! I tried hard!  
_ Of course. The very day you met him, you pumped all his personal information from Jaehyun.  
_ I just wanted to know him!  
_ And he didn’t want to. It was perfectly visible.  
_ Jaehyun told us he was shy. He didn’t ask me to leave!  
_ That’s right. Which is even weirder if you ask me.  
_ I don’t want to. It’s not that often that I meet someone like him.  
_ That is to say?  
_ But you’ve seen him! He’s … and then … and…

Donghyun lifted up his head and watched his friend for a moment. He began to understand where the expression ‘lovesick’ came from. It’s been a perfect match for Joochan lately. At his service, even though Joochan was extremely social and had had his share of girlfriends, and he knew him since their first day of kindergarten, he had never seen him put himself in this state for anyone.

Donghyun wasn’t sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing.  
He assumed it depended on what Jibeom thought. From what he had seen, he always looked at Joochan as if he were a strange specimen of which he did not know what to do and to which he did not know exactly how to react.

Meanwhile it was he who had to endure an unhappy Joochan because he had no immediate response to his messages. Donghyun didn’t even want to know how he got the other boy’s phone number.

_ Aaaaaaaaaaaaah  
_ What is it?  
_ He says he went to see some family in Busan.

Donghyun sighed and let his friend rave about it. Like… he hadn’t noticed his accent before that? With all the time he spent watching him?  
Joochan had never been happier to return to class. Not because he had to make a presentation, not because he missed his music club, not because he was bored at home. Who really loved school anyway? No, but he was finally going to be able to talk face to face with Jibeom again.

He thought he could meet him during the holidays, but he had spent them entirely in Busan! Hey he wasn’t going to forget that he owed him a song. Or better yet, a duet! He wasn’t going to cut it this time. He had no excuse.

Except that when he met him at lunch to eat with him, it was soon obvious that the boy was not in good shape. And even depressed.

_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ Hmm? Hey Joochan… You’re late.  
_ Always on Mondays. The natural science teacher goes into endless monologues and forgets the time.  
_ Um.  
_ Did you have a good holiday?  
_ I wouldn’t say that, no. I’m... I’m glad to see you.  
_ Hey. I knew you’d miss me!

He gave him a tired little smile.

_ Can you sing? asked the young man.  
_ Sing? Now?  
_ Please? The holidays were horrible and this morning… Do people have to be so stupid? Do they do it on purpose or are they born into it? I hope it’s not contagious because I’d rather be dead than reach that level of stupidity.  
_ Wow, that much?  
_ You have no idea.  
_ Jaehyun didn’t protect you?  
_ Him? Does he sometimes come down from his cloud?  
_ Sometimes, yes.

Well, poor Jibeom didn’t look good, but he was surprisingly talkative.

_ A song, asked again Jibeom.

Joochan went to the piano and began the first notes of ‘Miracle in December’. He could wait to eat. If it was for Jibeom, he could wait.  
On the other hand… he may not have chosen the song well because Jibeom was crying and that was certainly not the goal.

_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ Sorry… My grandfather passed away the day before yesterday, I…they didn’t want me to stay for the funeral and…  
_ Oh.

Definitely bad song choice. Maybe something on guitar? Something cheerful. MoonMoon, Contail? Why not. It was not sad! Jibeom seemed satisfied with his choice and joined his voice to his when he arrived at the chorus.

Joochan stayed on a little cloud the rest of the day. He was right! His voice and Jibeom’s one went very well together. He would have wanted to be able to record this and keep it safe.  
Donghyun must have shaken him several times to remind him to follow classes, but he didn’t care. He had sung with Jibeom! And Jibeom had smiled at him! He had asked him to sing for him!

_ What happened to him? asked Jaehyun when he joined them at the end of the classes.  
_ I don’t know. He’s been like this since noon.  
_ You shouldn’t leave him alone for lunch…  
_ He was not alone. He was with Jibeom.  
_ Which explains… Jibeom looked normal. As much as he could be anyway. He’s never very talkative or expressive.  
_ Oh, he can be expressive, said Donghyun.  
_ Can he really?  
_ Just make Joochan sing to loosen it up. It’s impressive.  
_ At this point?  
_ You should come with us at lunch instead of going to admire Youngtaek-hyung.  
_ I’m not going to admire Youngtaek-hyung! It just happens to be the model!  
_ That’s right. Let’s sing tonight. Where’s Jibeom?  
_ He’s talking to the teacher. He’s a geek, frankly. I’ve never seen anyone like math so much.

Donghyun grimaced. It wasn’t going to happen to him. Let alone Joochan, who had the bad habit of mixing everything up when it came to math.

_ You should ask him for private lessons, Joo. It would save you from whining every two minutes because Jibeom isn’t here and it might even make you average in math.  
_ Hey! I’m not that bad!  
_ Oh really? Remind me of your last grade?

Joochan replied with a little pout and shrugged. Private lessons with Jibeom? Why not. It was duplicative to spend time with him and possibly improve his results.

_ Good luck with that. I tried to ask him about an exercise he had completed in 5 minutes. He looked at me like he didn’t understand the complexities of this.  
_ Maybe he didn’t want to explain.  
_ Not even. He tried, but he doesn’t have the same logic as me.

Joochan burst out laughing. He loved Jaehyun, but it might not be a bad thing to not have the same kind of logic as him.

_ Joochan-ah?  
_ Hey Jibeom-ah! How was your afternoon? Better than this morning?  
_ Um. I’m not feeling very well. I think I’m going to go home now.  
_ Oh…  
_ Are you sure Jibeom? Sungyoon-hyung wrote a special song for Joochan during the holidays.

Jibeom leaned his head to the side in an interrogative manner at Joochan’s address.

_ Don’t force yourself. If you are sick…  
_ I … I don’t want to hear any noise. They’ve been going on all day, I have a headache. I wonder if that it is impossible for them to remain silent 5 minutes to listen to the course.

Jaehyun grimaced. Joochan sighed. He still wanted to sing with Jibeom, but he could not force him. Was it safe to let him go home alone?

_ My brother comes to pick me up. I stay with him, but my parents are still in Busan.  
_ Okay. See you tomorrow then?  
_ Certainly.

Joochan watched him leave, clearly disappointed. With Jibeom he always felt like he was taking 1 step forward for 3 steps back. He was hard to understand.

_ Joo? Let’s go?  
_ Are you coming to the club?  
_ Don’t look so disappointed. We’re not Jibeom, but we’ve been your best friends for over 10 years.  
_ I’m not disappointed. Let’s go sing!

He went to fetch Jibeom for lunch the next day after his class. He had been holding back all night and all morning from flooding him with messages, but he could picked him up, couldn’t he? He did that a lot, it wasn’t weird and certainly not harassment.

_ Jibeom-ah!  
_ Joochan-ah. Did you run?  
_ I didn’t want to miss you!  
_ You could just have send me a message so I’d wait for you, you know?  
_ Oh. But Donghyun says I’m sending you too many messages.  
_ Like it’s already stopped you. Let’s go eat. I hope you’re hungry. My brother feels guilty for bringing me back here with him, so he gave me a lot of expensive good stuff.

Jibeom had said the magic word! The food was Joochan’s weak spot. That and the music of course.

_ Sorry about yesterday, Jibeom told him once installed.  
_ Um?  
_ I didn’t want to end up with other people.  
_ Are you feeling better today?  
_ No, not really. But it’s okay when I’m with you. Too bad you’re not in my class.

Joochan blinked before giving him a big smile. Did Jibeom really said that?! Hey! How Donghyun was beside the point with his stories of harassment! Jibeom liked to be with him too!

_ Isn’t that better since Jaehyun sat down with you?  
_ How did you…? Oh, Jaehyun told you about it, I guess.  
_ I asked him.

Jibeom sighed.

_ It’s better with Jaehyun. I feel less isolated.  
_ That’s a good thing, right?  
_ Um.  
_ Do you want me to sing something?  
_ Eat Joo.

He said that, but he didn’t eat, pretending to be satisfied watching him eat. Well, if he insisted, he would eat before singing. It made him feel better yesterday and it wasn’t as if it was difficult for him.

***** ****************  
Joochan groaned on his bed. Why, but why did they have to meet Mirae today?  
Why couldn’t she stay where she had gone, hmm? And leave him alone at the same time.  
It was she who had broken up with him! By what right did she come to ask him an account?

He just wanted to spend a good afternoon with Jibeom… He had a hard time getting him to agree to go out first. As a result, he had to convince his friends and hyungs that it was absolutely unnecessary for them to come and chaperone them.  
And then his sister, his charming sister whom he adored, made fun of him for an hour before agreeing to help him choose an outfit for his date with Jibeom.  
Because it was supposed to be a date! Even if he hadn’t exactly presented it this way to Jibeom.

And after overcoming all these obstacles and joining Jibeom, they had fallen directly on his ex who had thrown him away like an old sock at the end of the previous school year.  
This daredevil had stuck them all afternoon, clinging to him like a particularly voracious leech. He saw very well that Jibeom had not taken it very well.  
He had tried to get Mirae out, but in the end, it was Jibeom who had run away and he was left alone with her trying to escape.

Jibeom did not answer his messages. He did not dare call him. There was a limit to which he could endure disasters in a day.  
Was Jibeom going to be mad at him for long?  
It started off so well too! They were on time and Jibeom smiled at him. Not the mini-smile that he served everyone, but the smile that showed teeth and that he usually reserved only for Joochan when he sang. On top of that, he had arranged his hair to clear his forehead, which looked really good and triggered a butterfly volley in his stomach.

He grumbled again, lamenting his bad luck.

_ Joochanie, did it go wrong?  
_ Noonaaaaaaaaaaa…  
_ Come on, come on, it can’t be that bad.  
_ Why are girls so mean?  
_ You weren’t dating a boy?  
_ Yes, but Mirae came in and ruined everything.  
_ Mirae, uh? Isn’t that the girl who said you didn’t treat her the way she deserved because you spent too much time with your friends?  
_ This is her.  
_ No luck. Just invite him home.  
_ Nooooooo. With everyone here, that would be terrible. He doesn’t need to be interrogate.  
_ Just choose your moment carefully. And stop whining and complaining, it doesn’t suit you at all.

Joochan blew. She was right, but he had had a very bad day, it gave him the right to lament for a moment. It’s time to work out a plan for Jibeom to forgive him and agree to give him another chance.

Could he ask Sungyoon-hyung to write him a song to coax Jibeom?  
Or he could find a song that he liked…  
Otherwise, he could also get down on his knees and sincerely apologize.

He sighted repeatedly during the evening meal, clearly depressed, under the teasing of his sister.  
As it was, he was going to spend his whole weekend ruminating.  
He had slept poorly, without much surprise. His mother had forced him to get up at 11am, but he had only one idea: to go back under his quilt.

_ Joochanie, there’s someone at the door for you.  
_ Noona?

He yawned and looked at the time. 3pm already?

_ Were you still asleep?  
_ No.  
_ Come on, he’s waiting for you in the living room, and if you hang around too much, mom’s going to go and interrogate him.  
_ Hmm? Who is it? Not Donghyun or Jaehyun…  
_ Oh no. This one is blond. Or light brown? If I had to come forward, I would say that this is your famous failed date of yesterday.  
_ Jibeom-ah?

Why would Jibeom come to see him? Worse! Poor Jibeom was stuck downstairs with his mother!!

_ You have good taste little brother, commented his sister with a smile not reassuring at all.

He took the time to try to fix his hair before rushing down the stairs and rushing into the living room.  
That was Jibeom, all right.  
He didn’t look very comfortable, sitting in front of his smiling mother, a cup of tea in his hands.

_ Joochan-ah.  
_ Hey. Is everything okay?  
_ My phone died and … um … like yesterday didn’t go exactly …uh…  
_ Oh.

Cell phone failure. That explained. It relieved him. So he had not deliberately avoided his messages.

_ Why don’t we go up to my room? You can explain it to me.  
_ No nonsense, both of you! His mother laughed.  
_ Mom!  
_ I’ll bring you some snacks in a few minutes.

Joochan sighed and drew his friend to his room, casting a dark look at his sister who watched them without even hiding. He assumed that he was lucky that his father went out to see friends. He had been ridiculed enough for the time being. At least his mother didn’t have time to release the photo albums!

_ Sorry about that. You can sit on the bed.  
_ Your mother is… um… curious.  
_ It’s been a long time since I brought a new face home. She’s used to Donghyun and Jaehyun, but you, not yet. Don’t worry, she won’t bite!  
_ My mother is very different.  
_ What do you mean?  
_ She is an artist. Painter. We learned very early not to disturb her.  
_ Oh. Yes, my mother works part-time in a pharmacy, but she was a stay-at-home mom for a long time.  
_ Must be good…  
_ So… your phone?  
_ My brother wanted to read my messages, I refused, we fought for my phone which made a gliding flight before giving up definitively.  
_ My deepest sympathies.

Jibeom shrugged, his eyes circling his friend’s room, examining his surroundings with curiosity.

_ Hyung will buy me another one. He has a good job, he can spoil his only brother from time to time.  
_ Oh. So he’s older?  
_ We’re 7 years apart. He practically raised me.  
_ What about your father?  
_ On business trip all the time.  
_ Um.  
_ So… for yesterday, I wanted to apologize.  
_ Apologize? You? Why?  
_ I haven’t been very polite to your… friend.  
_ Are you kidding? She’s the one who wasn’t very polite! It’s even a euphemism. It’s up to me to apologize.  
_ You didn’t do anything wrong. I guess she was just happy to see you again.  
_ Well, not me! She ruined everything!  
_ So… you didn’t want her to actually stay?

Joochan glared at him in horror. What gave him this impression?

_ I would never have given you an appointment there if I had only imagined that she would be there!!  
_ Oh.  
_ I hadn’t thought about her in months!  
_ I see. So we… are okay? It was just a misunderstanding? Because hyung says it’s just a misunderstanding and so… I came because I couldn’t call you.  
_ All is well Jibeom-ah, said Joochan.

Except their first date had been catastrophic, but anyway, Jibeom was smiling at him.  
Of course, his mother chooses this moment to knock on the door and enter with a tray of snacks and drinks.

_ Is everything all right?  
_ Mom…

As if he did not know that she had just spied on their conversation through the door. Most certainly with his evil sister.

_ Are you staying for a while Jibeom-ah? Will your brother pick you up later?  
_ I…yes, if Joochan wants me to stay.  
_ Stay! said Joochan, delighted.  
_ I’ll just have to call hyung. He was supposed to pick me up in an hour.  
_ All right, I’ll let you two talk.

A polite way of saying that she was going back to spy. She went out not without winking at her son before.

_ Do I have to expect another one of your exes to come and ruin the date? asked Jibeom after a moment of silence.

Ah! So, Jibeom had taken that as a date! And he stayed anyway! That was a pretty good sign, wasn’t it? What did he ask him for? Another ex?

_ What? Of course not!  
_ Good.  
_ But it is not excluded that Donghyun or Jaehyun…  
_ …  
_ I’ll tell them not to come!

He heard Jibeom laughing as he hurried to send messages to his 2 friends.  
In the end, they didn’t do much that afternoon. They had spent most of the time playing on his console. This made him discover new aspects of his friend’s personality.  
Jibeom was competitive and animated as soon as he started to play. Fortunately, he was also a good loser.  
He had heard him laugh more that afternoon than since he had known him.  
It was almost 7pm when his brother came to pick him up.

He had eaten with them in a very relaxed atmosphere. Joochan was so happy that he had not even protested when his father began to tell the nonsense he did when he was little. Jibeom laughed, he could endure some ridiculous stories.

Before leaving, Jibeom had kissed him. On the cheek, okay, but you had to start somewhere! It was progress and he was ridiculously happy.

The next day brought him back to a new week. Donghyun could not bear long to watch the weirdness of his friend before asking him questions.

_ Ok Joo. You need to calm down. What happened this weekend to put you in this state? Oh! It was this weekend your date with Jibeom. It went well, I guess.  
_ It was horrible. Catastrophic.  
_ And you’re happy?  
_ Mirae showed up and we couldn’t get rid of her.  
_ Mirae? What was she doing there?  
_ Who knows. She lives on the other side of town. I don’t know what exactly she wanted. Maybe just spoil my afternoon.  
_ Something tells me it didn’t stop there. Why didn’t you call me?  
_ I was too depressed. And then I looked for a way to fix it.

Donghyun sighed, shaking his head negatively.

_ I’m afraid to ask you what kind of crazy idea you might have come up with.  
_ Pff trust reigns! But I did nothing. Jibeom came to my house on Sunday.  
_ Which explains the emergency message that says I can’t come to your house on Sunday. You’re lucky I wasn’t here or I would have come just to see why I shouldn’t come.  
_ Pfff.  
_ So something interesting happened?  
_ That was great. We played the console and he ate with us before he went home.  
_ And then?  
_ And then what?  
_ Did anything else happen?

Joochan blinked and leaned his head to the side.

_ Rha! At this rate, nothing will happen between you until next year.

Joochan blushed and shrugged his shoulders. He was in no hurry. Jibeom had not sent him away. He seemed to enjoy spending time with him. It was good enough.  
Which was, obviously, not Donghyun’s opinion.

The dancer watched them more closely the following days, frequently raising his eyes to the sky and shaking his head and Joochan knew that his friend would not remain inactive much longer. Yet they hadn’t changed their habits.... Which may have been Donghyun’s problem, actually. 

_ Sugar dripping, sighed Donghyun. They’re so sugar dripping that I feel like I’m having a liver attack just watching them around each other.   
_ Hey!  
_ This is not new Donghyun, Jaehyun pointed out to him, more focused on his drawing than on conversation and ignoring with the force of habit the protests of Joochan.  
_ You haven’t seen them together this week, Jae-ah.  
_ Jibeom seemed in a better mood. Stop moving Joochan, you’re supposed to be my model, not try to knock Donghyun out with a binder.

Joochan sighed and remained motionless in his chair.  
The 3 of them were in his room and Jaehyun was drawing them as a project for his club. Or as a hobby? That was not the issue…

Why did they always gang up against him? Well… He assumed that Donghyun was not entirely wrong this time, but whenever he tried to ask Jibeom exactly where they were in their relationship, he seemed to lose the use of the word. That didn’t happen to him often… he was far from being a shy person.

_ And what do you think I’m supposed to do, Donghyun-ah?  
_ You’re the relationship expert! You figure it out!  
_ And it’s not like he doesn’t like you, added Jaehyun.  
_ Ask him out on Saturday and please resolve this tension between you two so we can breathe.  
_ What tension? And it didn’t go very well the last time we tried to get out.  
_ He speaks of sexual tension Joo, laughted Jaehyun.  
_ There is no sexual tension! protested the blond blushing.  
_ I note that you do not deny that he likes you.  
_ But…  
_ Listen, if, and I mean if, one of your exes decides to come and hang out on your date, I give you permission to call me to come and get rid of her since you’re not able to do it yourself.  
_ …  
_ Or you can just push him against a wall and kiss him, it works too, Jaehyun suggested with a smirk.  
_ Draw you!

Although he had to admit that it was an enticing prospect. Except that he was not sure that Jibeom reacted well to this kind of thing. He was much more comfortable with him than when he met him at the beginning of the year, but from time to time, Joochan could see that he was holding back from not running away.

_ Invite him to go eat chicken. No one can refuse this, especially to you.  
_ Or karaoke. You can both sing as you want for weeks!

Joochan sighed again. He had still not managed to sing with Jibeom. And it was not for lack of trying.  
And so, he took his courage the next and asked Jibeom to come and do a karaoke with him (read that Donghyun had harassed him until he moves and talks to Jibeom). Jibeom had accepted without hesitation, smiling.

This was followed by the stress of choosing his clothes -- again -- and his sister was having a field day. His mom took pictures before he left like he was going to prom or something.

When Jibeom arrived, the photo shoot had resumed with his father as director of operations and Joochan did not know if he should be embarrassed or be happy to have the photos for later. It didn’t seem to bother Jibeom. He smiled and lent himself to the game with good grace.

_ You have a nice family. I never realized that a family could be like that.  
_ Sometimes they are a little… too much, if you know what I mean.  
_ Maybe. But at this level, I think it’s better than not enough.  
_ Hum…  
_ Karaoke then? Just us?  
_ Yep. No escape!  
_ I had no intention of running away, said Jibeom laughing. I was just wondering who was going to invite himself this time.  
_ Nobody!

At least that was the plan. Unfortunately, when they got to the karaoke, they ran into Daeyeol-hyung and Sungyoon-hyung with friends and… it was enough to say that they had not succeeded in refusing to join them.

Oh they had a great time, but Joochan hadn’t exactly had a chance to talk to Jibeom. Nor even to push him against a wall to kiss him as Jaehyun had suggested.  
At least they sang together! It was always that. And it was fantastic. Joochan still had butterflies in his belly.  
_ Joochan-ah?  
_ Um?  
_ Will you take me home?  
_ Home? Isn’t your brother coming to pick you up?  
_ He’s busy. And my parents are still in Busan.  
_ Okay!

Anything to spend a little more time with him.

_ Are dates with you always so unpredictable?  
_ Not at all! All the dates I’ve had so far have always gone as planned.  
_ I’m just a special case then.  
_ Maybe because you’re the only one who really matters? I mean…  
_ Hum…  
_ Your dates were like that, too?  
_ The ones I had were pretty simple. But it’s much more fun with you. I wonder what will happen next time? A double date with your parents? A family reunion? Are we going to be embarked on a treasure hunt throughout the city?

Joochan felt his eyes widen and his mouth open without any sound coming out. Jibeom laughed, trying to imagine scenarios all more unlikely and hilarious than each other. He had never seen him like this before.

_ That’s where I stop. I live at the top of this building.  
_ Oh. So… uh… until Monday?

Jibeom bent his head to the side, always smiling.

_ Aren’t you forgetting something?

Joochan blinked several times, trying to think quickly about what he might have missed.

_ Thanks for coming?  
_ Ok… Jaehyun warned me that you could be a little…  
_ …  
_ But since I don’t want to wait until you to decide to ask me for a third date…

Jibeom approached him and he barely had time to close his eyes and felt his lips on his own. Ah yes, that was what he had forgotten. And it would have been a shame to leave without it!  
He returned home in a second state and spent the evening on the phone with Donghyun who loyally endured the ramblings of his best friend on the wonder that was Kim Jibeom.


	10. Soul bound part01

Soul bound Part 01

In this world, soul mates existed. It was an established fact. They were bound by a red thread by the little finger of their left hand, which remained invisible until they were 19.  
Unfortunately, not everyone was able to find the person on the other end of the line. And some people didn’t have a link at all. Or a cut thread due to their partner’s death.

The majority was waiting to find the right person, but some was still trying to form a couple without being connected to each other. Unless their link was broken at the base, this kind of couple unfortunately did not work on the length.  
It was not uncommon to see couples under the age of 19 perfectly happy. It was also not uncommon to see people waiting and staying single until they found the right person.

To tell the truth, it was surprisingly common for linked people to meet and so, most people were looking forward to their 19 years.

Of course, idols did not deviate from the rule. They were just more discreet. It went with the profession. Being an idol obviously did not prevent from falling in love.

Jibeom was aware of all this, so even though he adored Jaehyun and was hopeful that they were destined for each other, he preferred to wait until he was sure and saw the link in question.  
Jaehyun did not want to wait. He was sure of his feelings for his friend and saw no reason in waiting. He was not one of those who believed that having the red link was mandatory to be happy.

Jaehyun had won on this point after a fierce battle (although it was questionable to call a battle kissing someone until he could no longer answer). He was the only one who was perfectly happy with the result, but it was only a detail for him.

The whole group had been a little worried when they got together, in particular Youngtaek and Seungmin who, being themselves linked, understood everything that was involved.  
Nevertheless, their relationship was progressing in the right direction. They were happy and the 19th anniversary of Jaehyun arriving, they were all convinced that they were bonded anyway.

When Jaehyun woke up on January 4, 2018, the morning of his birthday, he took a deep breath before looking at his left hand where was now tied a bright red thread. It was fascinating.  
He spent a good part of the day with his family and went to the rest of the group at the dormitories in the evening. The boys had prepared a party for him, after all, it wasn’t every day we were turning 19. And, in reality, all occasions were good for partying!

Jibeom fell into the couch next to Sungyoon and placed his head on his shoulder.

_ Tired?  
_ Um.  
_ What did Jaehyun say?  
_ Nothing, murmured the young man.  
_ Nothing? What do you mean nothing?  
_ Just… he looked at my hand, but… he didn’t say anything.  
_ I see. What do you infer from that?  
_ I don’t know what to think. That’s a pretty bad sign, isn’t it?

Sungyoon sighed. He was not sure what to say to his teammate to reassure him. He was not really optimistic about this case. He had expected Jaehyun to cling to Jibeom and refuse to let him go. He believed, like the others that Jibeom and Jaehyun were bound. Jaehyun really had to talk to Jibeom. He couldn’t let him ask himself questions like that.

_ Are you going to be okay?  
_ I don’t know. I thought it would be different.  
_ He’ll probably talk to you when it’ll be just the two of you.

Jibeom gave him a light smile. He was grateful to Sungyoon for being there with him and trying to cheer him up.

The next day, Jaehyun had behaved exactly as usual without giving him any kind of explanation and Jibeom had not dared to ask. It was as if his birthday had never happened.... Whatever the situation, it would be fixed on his own birthday. Oh, he suspected that the red thread Jaehyun was seeing was not connected to his. He would have just appreciated Jaehyun being honest with him. Why didn’t he talk to him? Was he really going to have to take matters into his own hands to get answers?

_ It doesn’t matter Jibeom-ah, Jaehyun replied when Jibeom decided to ask him.  
_ Of course it matters!  
_ Not for me. My parents are not linked, that does not prevent them from loving each other and being happy.  
_ So we’re not linked?  
_ I didn’t say that.  
_ Jaehyun-ah!  
_ It doesn’t matter.  
_ For me it does! Why do I always have to take your opinions into account, but you never mine?!  
_ I take your opinions into account! protested Jaehyun.  
_ Oh yeah? And when? We always do what you want in the end.  
_ But it doesn’t matter Jibeom-ah. I love you, that’s all that matters.  
_ I…  
_ We love each other. We don’t need a red thread to tell us. We’ve been together for 2 years, it’s more important than a stupid thread. Whether it’s here or not.  
_ I do not agree.  
_ I know Jibeomie, but there’s nothing you can do about it. If it’s so important to you, you’ll see on your birthday.  
_ That’s all you have to say to me? 2 years together and that’s all you have to say to me?!  
_ Jibeom-ah…  
_ Forget it! I…  
_ I love you Jibeom-ah. Really. Red thread or not.

Jibeom closed his eyes and inspired. He no longer knew where he was.

_ I need to be alone.  
_ Jibeom-ah!  
_ Give me a bit of time.

Jibeom went to lock himself in the room he shared with Sungyoon. In a sense, he understood Jaehyun’s point of view and he could respect that. He had learned to deal with his friend’s beliefs. So, he who repeated over and over that he loved her, why could he not respect his own beliefs? It wasn’t the first time it happened. He usually let it go, but this time.... It was more important and he didn’t know what to do.

The way Jaehyun reacted, there was a very good chance they weren’t linked. What reason would he have had to hide it from him if that had been the case? It wasn’t Jaehyun’s style to play with that kind of thing. He knew it was important to him.

So… what to do? Break up? Wait for his birthday to confirm, hoping to be wrong and be able to stay with Jaehyun?  
Was Jaehyun trying to test him? That would be cruel. Not at all like Jaehyun. No, he would never do that to him.

_ Jibeom-ah? We’re going to practice, are you coming? What’s going on?  
_ Nothing, I... I’m fine.  
_ Jaehyun? asked Sungyoon, sitting next to him on the bed.  
_ It’s complicated. It should be simple, and finally, it’s… so complicated. Why can’t we love who we want hyung?  
_ We can. You don’t have to take the red thread into account. Some people live without it.

Jibeom shook his head negatively.

_ They live without it because they have not met the person at the other end. My brother tried and I have never seen him as unhappy as the time when he was trying to be happy with the person he loved rather than the person he was meant to be.

Sungyoon sighed. He couldn’t do much to help him.

_ That’s why I didn’t want to date him in the first place.  
_ Do you regret it?  
_ No. We had great times together. I thought… I thought he was the right one.  
_ That doesn’t mean you don’t love him. That doesn’t mean you don’t have feelings for him.  
_ And yet… I feel like I’ve convinced myself of something that I didn’t really feel.  
_ Jibeomie… did Jaehyun clearly tell you that you were not linked?  
_ No. He says it doesn’t matter.  
_ I see.  
_ What should I do?  
_ I don’t know Jibeomie. Wait for your birthday and you’ll see then.

And that’s what Jibeom did. He waited until February 3 patiently. They were in full promotion and therefore rather busy, nevertheless it took only a few seconds in the Jaehyun‘s presence to confirm his doubts. They were not linked.  
It hurt less than he would have thought. He knew what Jaehyun wanted. He also knew what he wanted and Jaehyun would no longer be part of his love life. He hoped he would remain his friend, but it might take a little time. Jaehyun did not seem ready to surrender without a fight.  
Right now, he had to get used to the damn thread. He was always under the impression that he was going to get his feet in it and fell spectacularly.

_ It takes a while to adjust, but you can’t really get mixed up in it, Sungyoon said.  
_ Are you sure about this?  
_ Certain.  
_ And it always shoots like that? It’s distracting.  
_ Is it pulling?  
_ Yes.  
_ If it pulls, it’s supposed to mean the other person is close.  
_ Oh.  
_ Get ready. We have to go to the lounge before the event. And you have a lot of presents to open.

And really, it went pretty well. The other members wished him a happy birthday in their own way. He had received calls from family and messages from friends. The event they attended was well organized and they were able to interact with their fans. He didn’t even fall because of that damn thread that was pulling everywhere. The person at the other end also had to participate in the event too, but for the moment, he was busy and not very interested.  
They had a little bit of time before they had to go back on stage, so Jibeom had been allowed to throw a vlive. The other members had brought him a cake and it was there that he noticed the red thread wrapped around Joochan’s little finger.  
That wasn’t possible, was it?

His mind went white for a while before he remembered where he was exactly and focused on what was going on around him.  
He was grateful to Youngtaek for having occupied Jaehyun, he was not sure that he would have been able to bear it for the moment. It would still be time to see to this link thingy later. Much later if it was up to him. If he didn’t acknowledge it long enough, maybe it would go away.  
Did Joochan always stick to him so often? Or was it only because Jaehyun was kept away?  
What was he supposed to do? Tell Joochan? But how? What if Joochan reacted badly?

_ Jibeom-ah? We are waiting for you for the party. You are the guest of honor I remind you.  
_ I’m coming hyung.  
_ Is there a problem?  
_ Not really. I was thinking.  
_ Don’t force yourself, you might fry the few neurons you have left.  
_ Ahah.  
_Do you want to talk about it?  
_ What was it like for you? When you met Youngtaek-hyung.  
_ It was… um… actually, I was so nervous that I don’t really remember. I suddenly found myself in front of him and he held my left hand in his, smiling like an idiot.  
_ So you knew right away.  
_ The thread had been pulling for some time. In fact, every time I came to Woollim, but I had not made the connection.  
_ It was sudden.  
_ Your thread pulls Jibeomie?  
_ I…  
_ Are you two coming? We’re waiting for you.  
_ Let’s go. It can wait, I’ll think about it later.

He did not give Seungmin time to answer and went to join his comrades. Partying would keep him from thinking, even if it was a temporary solution.  
The way Jaehyun looked at him did not help him quickly understood Jibeom. And he no longer knew how to behave with Joochan.  
That thread… that damn thread… kept pulling and it caused weird things with his heart and his emotions. Like it was pulling there too. And he didn’t know if it was normal. He didn’t know who to ask. He had tried to contact his brother, but he was busy and Seungmin and Youngtaek were of no help to him. The other members had never encountered this kind of problem, so he was… lost.  
It would have helped him if Joochan could also see the connection, but well… he really had to talk to him before his birthday. He’d feel betrayed if he didn’t tell him before July 31st, wouldn’t he?  
So...to talk to Joochan. There was the when and how. Or the how and when. It wasn’t clear. Nothing was clear, actually.

_ Jibeom-ah, you’re going to end up in a door if you keep daydreaming.  
_ You’ve been worse than Jaehyun lately.  
_ The thread is still pulling? asked Sungyoon.  
_ The thread pulls? Is it supposed to do that? asked Donghyun who worried as his birthday approached.  
_ Rarely, Daeyeol said.  
_ In some cases.  
_ Like?  
_ When the person sharing the link is close and the link is not yet … how do I say … in place.  
_ How can a link not be in place hyung? asked Bomin.  
_ Well, there may be several reasons, but in the case of Jibeom, his or her partner does not seem to be aware of the link and as Jibeom seems to have stayed away from the person in question, it gives this kind of thing.  
_ Why doesn’t the other person come to him? asked Joochan.  
_ Well, either that person doesn’t want that connection and is still in denial, or she’s not 19 yet.  
_ Oh, yes. If she’s not 19, Jibeom has to tell her.  
_ Otherwise it pulls?  
_ This kind of connection doesn’t like to be ignored, so yes, if Jibeom doesn’t do anything, it pulls.  
_ Why don’t you do anything Jibeom-ah? asked Jangjun.  
_ He doesn’t have to do anything, Jaehyun said.  
_ Don’t start Jaehyun!

Daeyeol massaged his temples. He felt the migraine coming. Normally, it wasn’t always easy to lead the band, but since Jaehyun’s birthday, it had become a titan’s job.  
It got worse with Jibeom’s birthday. Jaehyun didn’t want to respect Jibeom’s decision, just impose his own choices on him. Yes, it was a shame that they were not linked, but that’s how it was. Jaehyun had to accept it.  
Of course, since nothing could be simple, it seemed that Daeyeol would have to have a new conversation with the young man.  
He left Jibeom to Sungyoon. Although he had to admit to being a little curious to know who Jibeom was destined for. If he had been in his place, he would have done anything to meet her.

_ He is younger, Jibeom murmured.  
_ You know who it is? Why don’t you go see him then?  
_ I…don’t know how to approach this.  
_ Why not just tell him? said Donghyun.  
_ This is not easy.  
_ Tell him simply, you will be relieved, advised Youngtaek, busy drawing on the arm of his own bonded.  
_ But yes Jibeom-ah. Why not?  
_ Because it’s complicated.  
_ What is? You just have to find a time to tell him.  
_ Because it’s so simple…  
_ It’s not easy at all, said Joochan, busy devouring a bundle of treats meticulously. I would not like to be in his place at all.  
_ I … but …, murmured Jibeom, a little caught off guard by Joochan’s words.  
_ Taking into account your 2-years relationship with Jaehyun. Can you imagine the trouble? No, it’s not easy at all.  
_ Hong Joochan!! said Sungyoon clearly furious.  
_ What?

Joochan raised his head, surprised and realize that Jibeom had dramatically turned pale.

_ Oh, no, Jibeomie, I mean…  
_ Let it go, interrupted the young man with his head turned.

He didn’t want to hear any more. And that damn thread was hurting him now. He needed to isolate himself a bit and, above all, not think about what Joochan had said.

_ You really are an idiot, Joochan. It’s not a game, you know?  
_ Sorry hyung, I didn’t think.  
_ You don’t have to apologize to me.  
_ He’s on the verge of panic and you’re not all helping out as much as you are.  
_ You know something, Sungyoon?  
_ I don’t know any more than you do, but I know how to observe. Jaehyun is harassing him, and whoever he’s linked to, he obviously doesn’t know how to handle it.  
_ I’m going to go apologize, murmured Joochan.  
_ Not now, no. Leave him alone.  
_ Come on, let’s resume training now, intervened Daeyeol. Sungyoon, I let you take care of Jibeom?  
_ I’m going to see him. But be careful what you tell him about his link from now on.

He received a chorus of acquiescence before going in search of their comrade.  
He found him in one of the singing booths, in a ball under the desk. And in tears of course. No wonder he finally cracked.

_ Jibeomie?  
_ Hyuuung…  
_ Come on, come on, it’s not that bad.

He took him in his arms and let him cry all his soul. It had already been 3 weeks that it lasted, he needed to evacuate.

_ Are you feeling better?  
_ I don’t know.  
_ You want to talk about it?  
_ I don’t know, the young man repeated.  
_ Or we can just stay like this for a while.

It was not the most comfortable position, but it had the merit of having calmed the boy a little.

_ It’s is Joochan, murmured Jibeom after several minutes of silence.  
_ He was obsessed with his candy, he didn’t think.  
_ My link…  
_ What about your link?  
_ The person attached to my red thread.  
_ I’m not following you Jibeomie. I know you don’t want to talk to him, but it’s going to be okay. And when he’s 19, he would see it too.  
_ It is Joochan, Jibeom simply repeated in a tired voice.  
_ It’s Joochan? Joochan what?  
_ …  
_ It is Joochan… The person at the end of the thread is Joochan?  
_ …  
_ Okay. I see.  
_ …  
_ Well, it’s not the end of the world.

Jibeom did not seem to exactly share his opinion and had started to cry again.

_ Jibeomie…. It’s not that bad.  
_ …  
_ You don’t like Joochan? You know him well, it’s not so…  
_ …  
_ You’ll both be fine. You like Joochan, hmm? Don’t be sad, hmm? He’s a good person.

He let him cry until he calmed down. After a while, he would have no tears left. Certainly.  
He eventually fell asleep, completely exhausted.  
Sungyoon took him on his back and took him to the van. He had to take him back to the dormitories, but first to get their stuff and warn Daeyeol. He checked that Jibeom was still asleep and covered him with a blanket before heading to the room where the others were.

_ Sungyoon-ah. How is Jibeom? Did you find him?  
_ I’m taking him back to the dorms. I think it’s better. He’s exhausted.  
_ Is it going to be okay?  
_ It’s a bit complicated, but nothing to worry about. At worst it will be solved in a few months.  
_ How many months?  
_ Several. But he will decide to talk to him before that. If this idiot stops telling him nonsense.  
_ Ah. He told you who it is. Is it going to be a problem?

He blew, suddenly tired. Was it going to be a problem? Of course. Jaehyun would have reacted badly to anyone else, but Joochan? Someone so close to them, he would react doubly badly. What about Joochan? How would Joochan react? He was an unknown in all this.

_ Sungyoon-ah?  
_ There are too many variables to really know. I’m going. I left him alone in the car, so…  
_ Okay. I’ll see you later.

Jibeom did not wake up when he went up to the dormitories and laid him in bed. He stayed with him until the rest of the group returned.

_ Is he still asleep?  
_ This is not the right time, Joochan. You’ll talk to him tomorrow.  
_ I didn’t mean to hurt him and...  
_ I know, Joochan, but now is not the time.  
_ I don’t…  
_ Joochan-ah, go wash up and go to bed. You’ll talk to Jibeom tomorrow.

Joochan surrendered and came out of the room. But he was pretty sure he wouldn’t sleep. The training had already been horrible before that. He felt far too guilty. He really had to learn not to speak out of turn. It wasn’t the first time he’d come out with something stupid because he was distracted by food.

_ So? asked Donghyun.  
_ He’s asleep. Sungyoon-hyung kicked me out.  
_ Not very surprising.  
_ …  
_ Don’t blame yourself, Joo. Everyone else feels the same way.  
_ No one was stupid enough to say it out loud.  
_ Sure. But Jibeom won’t hold it against you. He’s not someone who hold a grudge.  
_ I know. He’s too nice. I hope his bonded doesn’t take advantage and treats him well.  
_ If that is not the case, we will make sure to train him, Donghyun said.  
_ Yeah…  
_ Between us and Jaehyun, he better hold on.  
_ He will already be lucky to be linked to Jibeom, sighed Joochan.

Donghyun blinked. Joochan seemed almost jealous.  
He left his friend to his thoughts and went to shower. They still had training tomorrow after all.  
Joochan apologized the next day, but Jibeom just shrugged. He seemed apathetic to say everything, and after a few days of this state, it became a bit worrisome.  
And he was missing Jibeom. Even for Donghyun’s birthday, he just showed up. They were all worried at that point. Jaehyun even promised to stay away a bit if it would help, but it got no reaction.


	11. Soul bound part02

Part 02

_ Looks like a rejection…  
_ He didn’t talk to him!  
_ Yoon! Look at him! The syndromes he has, it’s as if his bonded had rejected him.  
_ I’m telling you he didn’t tell him, Daeyeol-ah!  
_ So what?! He rejected him without knowing it?  
_ No.  
_ He may be with someone and…  
_ No. I’m telling you no!!  
_ Don’t get mad, Yoon, I’m just saying.

_ Are they talking about me?  
_ Jibeom-ah!  
_ What are you all doing hiding out here?  
_ We’re spying, Jangjun said.  
_ I see.

Jibeom walked towards Daeyeol and Sungyoon and took them both in his arms.

_ I’m fine, he said.  
_ You don’t look well, contradicted Daeyeol, frowning.  
_ I’m hungry. Should we order something hyung?  
_ Ah… yes, why not. What do you want to eat?  
_ Chicken!  
_ Sure. What was I thinking? Chicken.  
_ I’ll go order, said Sungyoon, smiling.  
_ For the others too, Jibeom pointed to his hidden comrades a little further.

It wasn’t long before the chicken arrived and they all settled in the living room to eat.

_ Do you feel better? asked Joochan while sitting next to him.  
_ Hmm. Must be the chicken effect. I feel great.  
_ Good. You made a decision then?  
_ No.  
_ This is not easy.  
_ I’m afraid he’ll be mad at me if I don’t tell him before his birthday.  
_ It is possible.  
_ You… you’d be mad at me?  
_ I know your situation, so… I might be lenient. At the same time, it would put you on the same level with him if you waited until he could see the connection.  
_ Equality? Um…  
_ What’s he like?  
_ He… he speaks a lot. He is inventive and likes to laugh and joke. He has a beautiful voice.  
_ Oh? He’s an idol too?  
_ Yes.  
_ In a band or solo?

Jibeom couldn’t hold back a little laugh. Why not after all? Describe Joochan to himself? Maybe he would guess? That would solve his problem. But knowing Joochan, unless he told him clearly.... And he didn’t see him that way. It was pretty clear. Unfortunately. It made it hard for him.

_ He’s in a band yes. He’s a main vocal.  
_ Oh? Not bad! He’s our age, right? He’s also a googoo?  
_ Yes. He’s from July.  
_ Hey! You’re lucky, they’re the best!  
_ That is debatable.  
_ No, no, it’s an established fact! You hit the jackpot!  
_ Okay. Let’s say I believe you.  
_ You look better anyway.  
_ It felt good to talk about it.  
_ Good! Is he handsome at least?  
_ Handsome? Sure. He has nice eyes. And when he’s not on a diet, his cheeks are plump. It’s… cute.  
_ You seem to like him.  
_ You say that like it’s something difficult.  
_ No, but… after Jaehyun, it may be…  
_ Oh. He doesn’t have to worry about that. He has nothing to envy.  
_ But… how is it going with Jaehyun? I mean… you were in love with him. It couldn’t just disappear?  
_ It’s different. How to explain… It was comfortable with Jaehyun and I thought it was love, but this link makes me follow a different direction and makes me feel things that I never touched with Jaehyun.  
_ Still, Jaehyun doesn’t seem to have changed.  
_ Maybe because the other person is away. To me, it’s like I found something I didn’t know was missing. I had envisioned not being linked to Jaehyun when he didn’t tell me anything at his birthday, but I didn’t think that moving on would be that easy.  
_ Weird. Or maybe not. These links are there to bring soul mates together after all.  
_ I wish it had brought us closer before.  
_ Why didn’t it? You can see it now, but in reality, it was always there.  
_ I… I don’t know.  
_ Well, it’ll work out anyway. July’s not far if you don’t want to tell him before. All you have to do is smile and offer him ice cream. He will certainly forgive you for not telling him.

Jibeom burst out laughing. A smile and an ice cream, eh? He was going to remind him when the time came!  
Fortunately, in the meantime, he had something to take care of and since he had finally accepted the link, the thread remained quiet.  
A new dynamic was set up with Jaehyun. He had, it seemed, accepted the situation and now behaved like a brother. It suited him very well. It was a relief. Even if he teased him mercilessly.

_ Nervous?

Finally, the last few months had passed quickly and they were now on the eve of 31 July. Jibeom was half determined to go to the back of Busan and stay there for the end of the season at last.

_ And if he…  
_ Everything will be fine.  
_ But if he…  
_ It will go well, Sungyoon repeated, holding the youngest against him. Try to sleep now.  
_ Hyung…  
_ Ssh. Sleep. Do you want me to sing you a lullaby?  
_ Um. Thank you hyung.

He had not slept much in the end, without much surprise.  
He had heard Sungyoon rise and go out just before midnight. Certainly to wish Joochan his birthday. It was their little ritual, but he hadn’t moved.  
How long would it take Joochan to realize that his red thread was leading him straight to him?

_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ Nnh?  
_ Time to get up.

Did he fell asleep? He could have sworn he intended to have a sleepless night.

_ Jibeom-ah?  
_ I’m awake hyung.

He went to the bathroom in zombie mode. He was sorely lacking sleep in the last few days. He had to be careful about that. The shower woke him up enough for his memory to wake up in force. Where was Joochan? He carefully left the bathroom when ready.

_ Hyung! The bathroom!  
_ Bominie. Sorry, I took my time.

Joochan was not there. Went to the agency with Sungyoon, Donghyun and Seungmin.

_ Jibeom-ah? Are you feeling okay?  
_ I...no. Not really.  
_ What’s going on? You’re really pale.  
_ I didn’t sleep very well.  
_ Are you okay? The others are waiting for us for Sungyoon and Joochan’s birthday.  
_ I…  
_ Of course it’s going to be okay! said Jaehyun, passing an arm around his friend’s shoulders. Let’s go!  
Ouch. Jibeom was really not sure he wanted to go. He would have gladly seized the excuse of not being well to avoid being in the presence of Joochan for a few more hours.  
It wasn’t reasonable. He wanted to talk to Joochan. Really. He was just...terrified.

Joochan was having a vlive with Sungyoon, Donghyun and Seungmin when they arrived. Jibeom did not really understand why his teammates had pushed him into the hands of makeup artists.

_ Sungyoon left very precise instructions and he insisted that we make you join the vlive. Wait, come here, don’t move.  
_ Hyung? What do you put in my hair?

And quite frankly, was it really a good idea to appear like this in front of Joochan? For having experienced it, to discover the person at the end of a red thread that just appeared in a vlive… It wasn’t especially a good thing. Joochan reacted strongly based on his feelings. He would be able to reveal their link while having the vlive before he even thought about the consequences.

_ There you go. Perfect. You can go, Jibeomie.  
_ What did you do hyung?

Jaehyun and Jangjun burst out laughing.

_ You make a beautiful gift, hyung, said Bomin, laughing too.  
_ Hyung!  
_ Come on! That’s what Sungyoon wanted as a birthday present. Smile and be cute! told Daeyeol before pushing him energetically towards the rest of the group in full view.

They immediately included him in their conversation. Sungyoon smirked at him. Joochan joked with him as usual and had no more reaction than a slight head movement looking at the young man’s hand.  
Jibeom immediately ran away when the vlive finished, with his head full of questions. Joochan had seen nothing? Or… Did he not see a link with him? Was that possible? Did Joochan see a link with someone else?

_ Jibeom-ah? Jibeomie?!!  
_ What’s going on?

Joochan watched Jibeom run away rather perplexed. What had stung him? It had been a real battery for several days, but now…  
He glanced at Sungyoon, who looked… worried?

_ Did I miss something?  
_ Joochan… Joochanie, did you notice anything special about Jibeom?  
_ He had a big red knot on his head. It was kind of cute.  
_ And on his hands?  
_ His hands? No? He seemed to be doing just fine. Frankly, I know he’s worried about his link, but he shouldn’t. His red thread has a very pretty color and the knot looks solid.

Sungyoon looked up to the sky and massaged his temples. But what was he going to do with him? Joochan had many qualities, but sometimes he missed the most obvious things.  
Donghyun and Seungmin looked at them without knowing what to do, oscillating between perplexity and amazement.  
Sungyoon resisted the urge to knock him out. It would relieve him, but it would not move things forward. 

_ Joochan, look at my hands, do you see anything?  
_ No?  
_ And on the hands of Seungmin and Donghyun?  
_ No. I’m supposed to see something hyung?  
_ Remind me what you saw on Jibeom’s hands.  
_ Just… his… red thread.  
_ Conclusion?  
_ Oh my God!! I saw… I saw the red thread! And, and… mine, and, and… hyung!!! The red thread!!  
_ Yes, Joochan, the red thread. Exactly.  
_ Jibeomie?  
_ Exactly, Sungyoon repeated.  
_ He tried to tell you, I believe, Joo, added Donghyun.  
_ And not just once, sighed Sungyoon.  
_ Oh. Oh! Jibeom’s link… it’s me actually. I was born in July and I’m a googoo. And… I talk a lot, I… I’m a main vocal…  
_ And the light was, Sungyoon muttered.  
_ Is it really me hyung? Did you know? Why didn’t Jibeom tell me?  
_ Yes and yes. I think he told you about it I think Joo. He tried. He told me you didn’t see him in that way, so you couldn’t imagine that you were his bonded.  
_ … That’s right. I didn’t think it was going to be me. It seems obvious now…  
_ After the fact it always seems obvious Joo. It’s not that bad.  
_ I’m an idiot. Jibeom must be mad at me.  
_ Of course not. He’s still afraid you won’t accept him.  
_ Why wouldn’t I accept him? I never understood why he was afraid his bonded wouldn’t accept him. And… it’s me. He… How could he think I’d push him away? He doesn’t trust me?  
_ I think he doesn’t trust himself…  
_ And also, you still said that you would not like to be his bonded because of Jaehyun, pointed out Seungmin.  
_ Oh. Oh! I said… It must have hurt him, Joochan whispered. I feel really stupid.  
_ That’s right, mumbled Sungyoon.  
_ You didn’t know Joo. You weren’t intentionally cruel.  
_ Except that Jibeom must not understand. It is partly my fault, but I did not believe that you would ignore the evidence.  
_ I don’t even know why. It was right in front of my nose. I even noticed that the knot and the color were rather pretty and looked like mine.  
_ Joochan-ah, why don’t you go talk to him now?  
_ Talk to him?  
_ To Jibeom. He must be panicking.  
_ Jibeom… Jibeom-ah!

Sungyoon watched him leave, shaking his head.

_ Joochan and Jibeom, hey? I didn’t see that coming.  
_ They go well together. It’s not that unexpected.  
_ Kind of Donghyun.  
_ Joo was very interested in Jibeom when he arrived in Woollim, but Jibeom was a bit impressive at the time.  
_ Strange though that he ended up with Jaehyun when it should have been Joochan from the start.

Joochan stopped breathless before Jaehyun and Jangjun.

_ Where is Jibeom?  
_ He…  
_ Where is he?  
_ Daeyeol-hyung took him back to the dorms. He wasn’t feeling well.  
_ Are you okay, Joochan?  
_ Jibeom didn’t give you his thing? I hope it’s not contagious. It’s going to be hard if we all get sick!  
_ What? No, I’m not sick!  
_ That’s good because there’s a party now! said Jangjun.  
_ But Jibeom-ah…  
_ Oh! Don’t worry, said Youngtaek, hyung takes care of him!

Joochan could only follow the movement and despite his efforts he could not return to the dormitories before 5am.

_ Where are you going, Joochan?  
_ To see Jibeom!  
_ Don’t wake him up! He has recordings early this morning, he has to get up at 6:00.  
_ But I have to talk to him hyung!

Daeyeol shook his head and showed the young man the door to his room.

_ Go to sleep, Joochan.

Sungyoon arrived behind Daeyeol and led him to the kitchen on a bogus pretext, winking at Joochan. He should think about buying Sungyoon a big present.

He went into the room and watched Jibeom sleep for a while. He couldn’t wake him up, could he? Not if he had to get up in an hour. He followed with his eyes his red thread from the little finger of his left hand and went directly to cling to the same finger of the same hand of Jibeom. How did he miss that before?

He lay down next to his friend and bound their little fingers, shivering at the reaction it provoked. Jibeom murmured in his sleep and pressed himself against him with a sigh.

He wasn’t going to wake him up, but he could wait an hour for him to get up. They could not really talk, but he could reassure him about the acceptance of the link. He could tell him that the situation suited him perfectly and that being linked to him was certainly the best thing that could happen to him.

That was the plan.

Unfortunately, he fell asleep and when he woke up, there was no Jibeom. Since it was over noon, it was not surprising, but he was disappointed. Especially since he himself had recordings all afternoon. By the time he finished and joined the rest of the band in the dance studio, Jibeom had gone with Jangjun for costume fitting.

He had intended to wait until Jibeom returned to the dormitory before falling asleep, but he had failed. In the morning, he woke up in his arms. Which was much better than all alone. Their bond was warm, reassuring and seemed to vibrate. It was very nice.

_ Joochan-ah? Are you awake?  
_ Um.  
_ Jibeom slept with you? What’s with you two?  
_ We… we need to talk, but we just cross paths.  
_ Is it something important?  
_ Yes. Sungyoon-hyung didn’t tell you?  
_ Just to let you two settle this.  
_ We’ll talk to the whole group after hyung.  
_ Is it serious?  
_ No. It’s something really good hyung, but we both need a little time.

Daeyeol remained silent for a while.

_ Is that what I think? he asked with a hesitant smile.  
_ It depends on what you think…  
_ Okay. I’ll give you the morning. Will that be enough?  
_ Thank you hyung.

Once Daeyeol came out, Joochan watched Jibeom again. He looked peaceful. The visit of their hyung did not seem to have bothered him. Joochan hesitated to wake him up. What time did he come home?

_ Joochanie, whispered Jibeom, blinking slowly.  
_ Slept well Jibeomie?  
_ Um. Always with you. Are you leaving already?  
_ We have the morning to ourselves.  
_ Um?  
_ To talk.  
_ Ah!  
_ It’s about time, huh?  
_ I filled the freezer with ice cream.  
_ You…? O-kay. Why?  
_ You said that with a smile and ice cream, my bonded would forgive me for not telling him we were linked.  
_ I said that… Rha! I should have known. I have to apologize for not understanding.  
_ You didn’t see me that way.  
_ You know me, I can be stupid sometimes. Damn it, I didn’t even react by seeing the red thread on your finger!  
_ I thought for a moment you weren’t seeing it.  
_ I’m really sorry. I make you suffer and that’s not at all what I wanted! I’m really an idiot.  
_ You… It’s not important. It’s what you think now that is.  
_ I feel incredibly lucky, Joochan said.  
_ Do you really?  
_ What about you?  
_ Sure. That’s... I was just afraid you wouldn’t want to be with me.  
_ I’m not that stupid. You’re all I could have hoped for and more.

It was sweet and dripping, but they both needed it. Moreover, even if Jibeom had taken a charming pinkish color, it did not prevent him from kissing Joochan and not letting him go away for several minutes. Not that Joochan wanted to go away in the first place. They had spoken enough for the moment and could well spend their morning at other more pleasant things!


End file.
